How Did I Get Here?

Genius

2012-01-19T05:13:00.004+01:00

I find this quote from Albert Einstein very inspirational. Feeling stupid or less than is a horrible feeling. Hopefully one day we can all find our genius.

2011 through the Facebook Status- part 1

2011-12-27T21:36:00.003+01:00

January 1st:
I think Obama should use an executive order to get rid of the BCS. I think that is a cause we can all get behind.

January 5th:
why are the Kardashians famous?

January 7th:
a conversation about whether bridges of madison county is a meryl streep movie or a clint eastwood movie shouldn't end in a shouting match but in my family it was inevitable. the follow up argument about whether we were watching the movie on the Oprah Winfrey Network took the argument to a ridiculous level.

January 16th:
my mom felt the need to leave me a 5 part voicemail. the last four parts started with, "Hi Carol I'm not done yet."

January 18th:
I turned and looked into the window of a local Mexican restaurant at exactly the wrong time. Right when I looked in I saw an older man (60ish) literally feeding a younger man (early 20s) a banana. Now I have to ask… why did he have a banana in a Mexican restaurant?

February 6th (my first time at Urban Village Church- Tim Kim preached)
at church today the minister was a total 20 something hipster. he had to keep telling us the things he said are ironic.

February 10th:
note to the 'band' I just saw, being strung out on drugs does not make you an artist! and yelling 'fuck capitalism' at the end doesn't make you an anarchist.

February 14th (my first time at Mongays):
I got 'outed' as being straight at an LGBT Faith meeting. ah, well what can ya do God loves people of all sorts :)

February 19th:
So... year 26 was definitely not my year. I'm really gonna NEED year 27 to be my year.

February 25th:
My approach to relationships is like Gaddafi's, "If they don't love me. They don't deserve to live!"

February 25th:
apparently dancing down the street pretending I'm Doris Day in my head will garner quit a few looks! too bad life isn't a Doris Day movie cuz it would get me some looks from James Garner

February 28th:
oh my goodness! Second City just did a Lady Gaga song about Bontekoe Dairy Farms! my face hurts from laughing so hard :)

March 3rd:
I LOVE walking around N. Halsted in Chicago. I think cuz it reminds me of Amsterdam.

March 4th:
I like contemporary art museums they make me believe if I did drugs I too could be an artist.

March 6th:
Chicago Moment. Tourist: what happened? Chicago Cop: Well there are 30 fucking fire tucks what do you think? Tourist: I don't that why I asked you. Chicago Cop: Do not make me me explain why there are 30 GOD DAMNED FIRE TRUCKS HERE, and this whole area smells like FUCKING SMOKE! Tourist turns back to friends: I guess there was a fire or something."

March 12th:
me dancing at the EL a woman gets out of her car to yell, "you don't know how to dance!" my response, "why thank you! and a fine evening to you too." That shut the bitch up.

March 14th:
I like that at a gay bar karaoke doesn't start till after Rupaul's Drag Show

March 15th:
Attending my first Drag Show tonight. It's like Drag Open Mic night! How exciting. As Mandy said I can say in the future, "Oh, I knew her when she was just a Drag Princess

March 16th:
I just want to say I am the master of being abandoned in gay bars and making new BFFs!

March 24th:
I found once I started thinking of crazies on the train as performance artists I didn't find them so annoying. now I'm pleased that I get a show, for FREE!

March 27th:
going to church on 1.5 hours of sleep after a very fun late night out. It's like Senior year of college all over again. however, I know I have grown up because now I am mature and smart enough to wipe of last night's make up before putting on today's face :D

March 28th:
IN YOUR FACE CHICAGO!!!!!!! Just when I was going to give up on ya I get a job at the Museum of Science and Industry!!! Woohoo! :D

Reverse Culture Shock: after a year amongst The Gays.

2011-12-26T21:28:00.002+01:00

The World Traveler, Vagabond, the Best Friend you never see. That’s been me for the better part of my adult life. Running, flying, biking around the world. Always someone new to meet, a new language to learn, a new site to see. Most comfortable when out of my element, at ease when stressed about a flight, peaceful when crammed into a bus seat.
This past (almost) year I have been living in the capital of the Midwest: Chicago. Close to home, and seen to be wholly without adventure. Not exotic the way my previous adoptive homes were. I was saddened as I wore out my travelers boots walking the streets of Chicago last winter. I hid them away in my closest not strong enough to throw them away and say good-bye to my wanderlust ways.
My favorite part of traveling and the part I assumed was gone, at least while I remained in Chicago, is immersing myself in a culture that is not my own. I enjoy learning the holidays and customs of another culture. I read history books about their past to better understand how they came to be the way I find them now. Being the chatter box that I am I will quickly start learning the language of my new community in order to better connect with those around me.
The move to Chicago was a spur of the moment decision. A place that wasn’t suppose to have that weird adjustment period that comes with moving to a new country. With no money, no job, no friends, no family and no place to stay; Chicago actually proved one of the most difficult adjustment I had ever made. I had nothing and I knew it. I didn’t even have the benefit of enjoying my passion for learning about new cultures, for I was in the midst of a culture that I already knew.
Midwestern Mentality: Check. I’m the daughter of a Midwestern Dairy Farmer. My Midwesterness is undeniable.
Big City Living: Check. Already lived in that crazy, wonderful, international city of Amsterdam.
Extremely Corrupt Government: Child please. Let’s just say Kyrgyzstan and Uganda. Double check.
Only recently while experiencing reverse culture shock did I realize that I had found and become apart of a culture not my own. Without realizing it I had immersed myself in Gay Culture. I now speak fluent Fabulous. I have read numerous books and articles this past year about the Gay Rights movement in the United States and around the world. I have even participated in the Gay High Holy Days: Pride, Market Days, and Halloween.
This reverse culture shock came when I returned to a familiar place: the sports bar, a straight sports bar. A bar filled with hetero-normative behavior ...eerrrr… in a way guys in that bar would understand it was filled with Dudes.
Beer guzzling, whiskey shot taking, high fiving, chest bumping, backwards hat wearing Dudes. My people. My Dudes. Someone chest bump me now! I was in a room full of Lions fans(my favorite sports team) most of them Michigan State alumni (I myself am an alumna of that fine institution). Regular Dudes from Michigan have always been my specialty.
I can talk sports, especially Michigan sports. I LOVE beer. I’ll do as many shots as you do and when you pass out in the corner I’ll still be standing and suggesting that you buy me another one. These kind of guys have always loved me. They have been the ones I call to move my couch when I move. They are the ones who have helped me steal beer from the party next door when the party I’m at has run out. I have shot guns at cans with these guys. I know them.
Or so I thought.
Last Sunday I experienced the same feeling I had my first time back in an American grocery store after Kyrgyzstan, a bath after Uganda, or the first time I saw my friends sneak off to smoke a joint after coming back from Amsterdam. I was experiencing reverse culture shock. Being thrown back into the deep end of your own culture after an extended period away can sometimes be just as jarring as being ripped from your native culture and put into one you have never heard of. I suddenly found myself sitting back and observing instead of fully participating in the rituals of the sports bar. Dudes still high five, get aggressive for no reason, and the ubiquitous shot of whiskey was ever present.
It was me that was no longer present. I was in a daze trying to re-learn social patterns that I know I know. Then I found myself playing a new game in my mind. Spot the gay. Who is on the DL (Down Low) in the Sea of Dudes? This is similar to a game I play in Europe: spot the American. Not the obvious ones, not the ones like me that cannot blend in no matter how hard they try. No I like to find the ones that are trying their darndest to wear the right shoes, coat, and jaunty scarf but some how still read as American.
My bench on the side wall gave me a great panoramic view of the Sea of Dudes. My year of adventures amongst the Gays have trained my eyes to spot them even in the dimmest of lights. The way a lighthouse keeper’s eye are trained to spot a ship in the distant horizon. Unsure if I was really spotting Gays in the Sea of Dudes or if they were just mirages I was relieved when a back up pair of eyes came in. My best friend here in Chicago, who happens to be gay, showed up. He picked off my potential targets immediately: chic scarf to the left of us, tight gray sweater at the bar, The over compensating dude at my table who when the Lions won in an amazing 98 yard run at the end of the game celebrated by rubbing the back of his “buddy.” Sure Dude. Keep lifting weights, no one will ever think you’re gay.
This reverse culture shock happened to me by going no further than walking distance from my apartment. The traveler mentality, my passion for people, and adventure aren’t based on how far away from home I go. My return to hanging out with Dudes reminds me that I might need to start making time to occasionally Bro It Up so I don’t have that shock again. Like all great travelers, even if I am staying in one city, I need connect with my ability to slide in and out of cultures with ease. Especially between my native culture and my adopted culture.
As I approach the year mark of me living in Chicago I get nervous. Should I make a run for it? I have enough money to get to… Wyoming. Maybe Idaho.
I don’t stay places.
I leave before I can get left behind. Yet, something is keeping me here. I want to stay here. I want to develop very real and long term friendships. Not the surface friendships the constant traveler develops, the ones that keep you from being overtly lonely but are not intimate, deep, and lasting.
There in that straight Dude Bar, that I didn’t know anymore, I felt like a traveler again but it also put in to perspective that I have some very real friendships here. I embraced by a community of people that are not my own but I have grown to love them and care about them, and gosh I hope they feel the same way. Right now I’m happy where I’m at, amongst the Gays. And if I ever need a jolt of culture shock and the travelers rush, Wrigleyville and bars full of Dudes are a short train ride away.

#alwayssexy

2011-10-26T00:56:00.003+02:00

Self Portraits from the #alwayssexy collection
Explanation for why I do this coming soon.

Sexy Whoopie Cushion

2011-10-11T07:36:00.001+02:00

Sexy Whoopie Cushion, a photo by carolspacelynn on Flickr.

Halloween for grown women has become all about being "sexy".
It's empowering to women to make every inatimate object sexy, right?
Here is my contribution to the Sexy Halloween epidemic we are facing: The Sexy Woopie Cushion.
You'll never look at a woopie cushion the same way.
I'm reclaiming what sexy means and making Halloween fun again :D

Snow Storm in Chicago

2011-02-10T21:08:00.005+01:00

I know it is a bit late to post my photos from when we had a huge snow storm here in Chicago but I'm trying to get back on track to blog regularly and photos is easier for me right now than writing a whole piece. Some of these photos are from my camera phone so I apologize for the poor quality.

A Car Fossil is left after a week of being trapped in the snow the car is finally released.

The Chicago Dibs System. Apparently if you dig yourself in the snow you can place a ratty old chair in the place to hold the spot for when you come back. I said in Michigan we would just run over your chair. :D

Almost lost in the snow.

The sidewalk next to my apartment after the snow blower has come through.

The chicago Skyline.

The Buck Pole

2010-12-17T00:04:00.011+01:00

Northern Michigan is unto itself. I find when I have friends come up for visits it can be as much of a culture shock if not more than traveling to another country. I think some people's shock is that it is so different from where they live yet relatively close, at least with another country you have to travel a great distance first. This year I was able to finally participate in a distinctly Northern Michigan cultural event, The Buck Pole.

The Buck Pole, as I recently found out is specific to Northern Michigan so I had to be up here at the right time to see it. The Buck Pole coincides with the biggest holiday of the year, the first day of rifle season.

Up here there is a different way of keeping seasons than the standard four most people know: Summer, Fall, Winter, and Spring. Although if you live in Southern California you have your own versions of seasons as well: Nice, Wild Fire, Mud Slide, and light sprinkling of rain that brings everything to a complete halt. Michiganders residing in the Northern part of Michigan have lots of seasons: Turkey, Migratory Birds, Fishing, Elk, Bear, Waterfowl, and Deer. As far as I can tell Deer season is the most popular of the seasons. It is even split into two seasons- rifle and bow.

The first day of rifle season is so big that the school and many business shut down that day because there won't be enough people around to keep them going. In Michigan the first day of rifle season is always Nov. 15th. That day I woke to the sounds of rifle shots at day break. Throughout our family's farm there were deer shanties strategically placed with my brothers and their friends. The goal on our farm is to have the first buck on the pole, doesn't matter if it is my brothers or one of their friends just as long as it is from our property. Once again this was pulled off with my brother Doug's friend Erik Page bringing in the first buck.

Since I don't hunt my job was to wait by the pole and get pictures and meet all the hunters and listen to their stories.

Let me elaborate for a minute on the pole. It is about 40 or so feet and is in the middle of the village outside of the one bar, The Horseshoe. It stands there all year for this one single day. As people kill there deer they bring them to the Buck Pole where they will have a rope tied around their neck(the dead deer not the hunter) and will be hung from the pole. The pole is open for Bucks to be strung up from sunrise on the 15th and closes at 11 am on the 16th. Anyone participating is guaranteed some kind of prize.
The night of the 15th is crazy. For such a small village there was a maddening amount of people standing around the Buck Pole admiring bucks, trash talking others, and telling tales of how they shot their white tail or how the biggest one they ever saw just barely got away. The cars lined the streets from one end of the village to the other. People would grab the hoof and turn a buck around to get a really good look. "Didcha see that one?" gets asked a lot. People drink their Bud Lights that are snuggled away in their Buck Pole cozies from the year before.

As someone who has never hunted this was an intense sight. I normally don't handle dead animals laying around very well. Yet, somehow when they are strung up and the whole village is out looking at them I don't seem to mind so much. With men dressed in orange and camo everywhere you turn and a stack full of stories about all the almost great bucks the could have maybe gotten if this had been a little different, I have to say it is a cultural experience worth having. If you aren't a hunter it is worth just coming up to drink and see how big of a deal hunting is for some. And if you are a hunter where they don't have buck poles come on up and see if you can get the big one or at least tell the tale of how you almost got it.

Almost done

2010-08-12T04:22:00.002+02:00

I am almost done with my Masters Thesis. My life can begin again. I will be updating this more again after my thesis is done. You can check out carolbontekoe.com. It is a website I'm starting to show future employers who I am and why they should totally hire me :D

I want to be a cheesemaker

2010-03-25T13:43:00.005+01:00

Last weekend I went to the least populated provience of one of the most densely populated counties in the world-Twente. I hadn't ever been to Twente so it was new experience for me. And after living in Amsterdam so long I get really excited when I head out of town and have some room to move around.
I was with my friend Claartje and we went to visit her hometown of Losser- Loser with we a little extra. :P
Since there isn't a whole lot to do there Claartje's mom suggested with go visit her new friend Pauline, a cheesemaker in the area.
Pauline was incrediably kind and open to us, giving us the full tour of her farm/cheese factory. The whole time I was like I want to do this! I want to be a cheesemaker. I have a random assortment of old jobs behind me maybe Cheesemaker can be my next calling..

USA vs Canada

2010-03-01T00:46:00.013+01:00

I was invited to watch the USA vs Canada Hockey game at an Australian Bar. I agreed. I figured it would be a nice chance to keep in touch with my American Roots, have some beers, and in general have a good time. My friend that invited me to watch the game is Canadian and I knew going into it that the other people we would be watching with would be Canadian.
I decided before the game to show some USA pride. I don't have any clothing that says USA- mostly because I don't like being taunted every five feet (yes feet- NOT METERS!) as I walk down the street. All that I could find to show my American Pride was my American Flag that was hanging on my wall. I cut the strings that hung the Stars and Bars up on my wall and packed it away nicely in a zip lock bag. I was ready to face those Canadian Ice Holes. I refused to be intimidated out of cheering on my team- Team USA.
When I entered the bar it was a sea of Red. I almost got excited, my brain instantly connecting hockey with red- RED WINGS! Than I realized the whole bar was dressed in red because they had come to cheer on Canada. I looked around for anything that might say subtlety, "I'm an American." I saw nothing of the sort. So, I felt the need to scream it out loud. I slowly pulled out my zip lock bag and released the Stars and Bars into her glory.
"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! USA! YEAH BABY! STARS AND BAAAAAARS!!!!!! LET'S GO AMERICA!!!!"
I had been unleashed. I never get to feel apart of American sporting events anymore. They certainly aren't showing my Detroit teams and MSU will have to do pretty amazing during March Madness for me to get the chance to watch them here. But tonight they were showing the USA vs CANADA. My chance had come to cheer on MY team.
There were a handful of other Americans in the bar and I ended up meeting each of them, me becoming the de facto American Embassy in the bar. Each one hand been conditioned through years of travel to hide their American-ness. To cheer, but at a level where no one would know that they are from America. One Canadian woman came up to me and pointed out that her husband is American. Then followed it up with, "He has traveled a lot so he knows not to show that he is American." I received at least 5 other comments about how other people had traveled enough to know not to have an American flag. They were all implying that I am not as well traveled, and clearly have spent little time outside of America. I don't need to defend myself with numbers, all I will say is I'm pretty well traveled myself. The thing is I refuse to be intimidated into not being proud of my background, heritage, and country. I especially refuse to be scared away by a bunch of Canadians.
Since I was the only American showing pride I became the focus of 95% of the bar's cheers and jeers. Whether cheering "Go Canada Go!" or pissed off because the USA had just tide the game I was the person everyone was looking at. I didn't mind, I actually found it kind of adorable. I also found if you keep calling Canadians adorable during an intense Hockey Game you can push them almost to the point where they forget their manners. My favorite was how they started chanting "Universal Healthcare" at me. I was like I don't know what you want me to do, I agree with you. I wish the Democrats weren't so afraid of being bullied by the GOP and would just pass something through. I knew I had gotten under their skin when they started chatting, "Universal Healthcare." When Canada scored a goal I was shoved. When America scored a goal I was tickled. When I went to the bathroom I was booed. I chose to take it all in stride. Cause sorry ya'll I know you think cause I have 'Merican Pride I must be un-educated and not well traveled, but the thing is there is almost nothing you can say to me at this point that I haven't heard before.
When America lost in over-time I was bummed, not to a point in proportion to how excited the Canadians were over winning. One guy even yelled, "This is the BEST DAY of my LIFE!" I thought, well good then that Canada won. Because there is no way that America winning any sport in the Olympics(even the Summer ones, which we all know are the ones that count) could make me yell that. Because it simply isn't true. America winning doesn't make me a winner and America losing doesn't make me a loser. I love my home country but it's wins and losses in international athletic competitions doesn't make or destroy my world.
At the end of the game I went around congratulating everyone in the bar. Even agreed to take a photo of all the Canadians. I was told I'm a really good sport. They probably told me that because every time everyone in the bar started booing me I just shouted back, "Good Sportsmanship is rewarded in Heaven!"

Oh, Canada and welcome to where Americans were a couple years ago. Every Canadian in the bar booed when they showed their prime minister Stephen Harper on the screen. Our president is pretty cool and we don't have to boo when we see him on screen. Yay! So, Canada you may have the gold- but our President is hotter than yours. So, who are the real winners?
:P

What's the Best way to Celebrate Black History Month?

2010-02-12T13:41:00.001+01:00

With All Things Dutch!

The Colbert Report

Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

Celebrate Black History Month With Heineken

www.colbertnation.com

Colbert Report Full Episodes

Political Humor

Skate Expectations

Dutch Sensitivity

2010-02-12T02:19:00.001+01:00

Looking for a Good Drink in Amsterdam

2010-02-09T16:38:00.002+01:00

When I first arrived to Amsterdam I didn’t have a place to stay. The University of Amsterdam had messed up my housing. They kept sending my housing information to Alaska and the housing papers would say that I needed to have them back to Amsterdam by a certain date. However, the papers kept arriving after the deadline to have them back by. They gave me three chances and than declared that I couldn’t follow rules so I didn’t get housing. I was coming to Amsterdam with or without housing. So, thanks to University of Amsterdam’s disorganization I came without housing. For the first month in Amsterdam I had to move from hostel to hostel and I also did some couchsurfing. Most people on Couchsurfing didn’t want to put me up because I wasn’t just passing through Amsterdam but staying. However, my first host with Couchsurfing was Wiebe and when I was staying with him he showed me my favorite bar in Amsterdam: De Zotte.
Actually De Zotte isn’t so much a Bar as what the Dutch call a Bruin Café and Americans call a Hole in the Wall. It is quite small and dark, or in Dutch terms Gezellig.
I always enjoy the vibe of De Zotte and the options I have to drink. De Zotte is a Proeflokaal (Trying Location) for Belgian Beers. Over two hundred options. I have tried the variety of Dutch Beers, but to be honest there isn’t that big of a collection, and it is especially nothing compared with their Southern Neighbors style, variety, and approach to beer. So, one of my favorite things about living in the Netherlands is how easy it is to get Belgian Beers. At De Zotte there are over 200 choices. I have been attempting to work my way through the list. I normally only go when I have company and I haven’t had any guests lately so I have had no good opprotunities to keep working on my check list. The beers range Very Weak to exceedingly strong, from Blondes to Ambers, to Bruins.
De Zotte is a couple blocks from Leidsplein (the Tourist/over priced center of the city). However, these two blocks provide a nice cushion from the tourists and the prices of that area. I think if you are looking for a fun night of trying different beers than De Zotte is the place to go in Amsterdam.

FEBO

2010-02-03T10:29:00.001+01:00

Come along with me on a journey to FEBO:

An Icy situation

2010-02-02T13:26:00.002+01:00

I would like to take a minute and not recommend something in Amsterdam: the Ice Bar. The Ice Bar is located just outside of Rembrandtplein on the Amstel River. It was the most worthless 20 Euros I spent since moving to Amsterdam, and believe me I have wasted a lot of money.
What happens is you schedule a time to go to this “hip” and “trendy” and (pun completely intended) “cool” bar. You are told you will get a half hour in the actual ICE bar part. You decide to do it because you will get awesome photos with your friends of all the good times you are having in Amsterdam. And in this facebook era of “Tag it” hasn’t it all just become about photo ops?
When you get there they will force you to wear a silver Heineken jacket for cross promotion. If you are fat this will be an uncomfortable experience because the jacket will not be big enough. you will become Chris Farley in Tommy boy "Fat Man in a little Coat..."
Once you get inside they will inform you that you can’t take pictures but you can purchase pictures that they take of you for 19 euros for one or 35 euros for two. You will be pissed off at this information and want to leave but too late, they already have your money. You stand in a tiny ice freezer (which if you went to a slaughterhouse I’m sure you could get the same ambiance) with a big screen at the end. They will show a weird “4D” movie about a penguin and you will be given two drinks. They will be in a glasses made of ice, but this is trickery because this glass will make it so you have less of a drink than you would otherwise.
Some Euro-trash techno is played and than you leave. That is it. That is where 20 Euros of my money went. You might think that I went recently and this is a new thing that I'm thinking about, and thinking how horrible it was. However, it isn't a new pain. This is old pain. This happened months ago. However, the sting has come back lately with the icy unsalted sidewalks and streets of Amsterdam. As I slip on some black ice that I couldn’t see coming I flashback to the Ice Bar and how I never saw it coming.

I don't want to be one sided on this so I am presenting here the website to Amsterdam's Ice bar: http://www.xtracold.com/index.php?option=com_wrapper&Itemid=57

Take a look and you'll imagine it's awesomeness too, just like me and my friends did. Like the a kid signing up for the army, you can imagine the glory all you want- but you need to listen to the solider who has been there when they tell you about the horrors.

Okay I think I just got a little dramatic at the end... but I really hated the Ice Bar. And my Mama always taught me to never use the word hate.

End of 2009 in Facebook Status.

2010-01-02T20:38:00.007+01:00

I have gotten really lazy about updating this lately. Mostly just posting videos and what not and calling it a day. At the same time I have gotten terrible with over updating my facebook status. So here I present some of my facebook statuses (stati?) from my December. Oldest to newest:

Why am I always so creepy? Took some headphones that I thought were the library's and left the crappy ones the librarian gave me in their place. Some Dutch dude had to tap me on the shoulder and ask if I could give him his headphones back. Then he kept repeating, they're my PERSONAL headphones... PERSONAL" Gave me the ...old stink eye(as he should) as he replugged them into his Viewing maching(TV).

While nothing can replace my favorite Dutch word sinaasappelsap- Orange Juice, I do now have a very close second place: Kiplekker- Fit as a Fiddle. :D

Turns out after my friends abandon me at a Gay bar for either "not feeling it", "sleep", or "sex with the ex" I can make instantaneous new gay best friends- apparently I'm funny. As it turns out the hags I momentarily replaced HATE me. Oh, Well when I said I was going to dance tonight I meant it... whether any of my friends are there or not.

Making myself a tutu

Its sad when you get advice from a Transvestite as to wear you can buy big lady shoes and your feet are still too big.

Working on my tutu while watching I Love Lucy. I couldn't be cooler.

Finished my Tutu! Now I need to go out to shake my money maker in it. Note to Self: If you are going to go out in public in a tutu... YOU BETTER OWN IT! Confidence, confidence, confidence

I just want to be cool like Gender Studies majors so all I have to say is: Hegemonic Masculinity.

Is setting aside time to do some online YARN shopping with a friend pathetic, nerdy, or totally awesome?

My 10 year plan. Though it is evil mwhahahahaha I'm glad so many of my girls have been giving me adivce for how to make it happen. Operation Break up a happy couple and make him realize I'm amazing is in full swing. Only have 9 years and 10 months to make it happen.

Claartje bedankt voor laat mij maar onzeker zijn. Thank for having my back and letting me vent :P Same here any time ya need me :D

I'm reading an old tourist pamplet for Amsterdam. And while reading it I noticed it took 6 digs at Venice. I think someone is jealous of the attention someone else is getting.

Lipping singing to Dreamgirls in front of my window helps me forget I accomplished non of my goals for today. Oh, That's a lie. I checked out a book.

Got invited to go to a Taiwanese Church on a Saturday night and I of course said, "yes!" What else is there to do on a Saturday night in AMsterdam?

Made my roommate wake up early to go shop for Christmas decorations. She is not happy right now :P But she will be once our room is decorated.

Dutch people DO NOT know how to shovel! I am amazed so many Michiganders grandparents and great-grand parents survied their first summers in Michigan.

Today I'm pretending to Bea Arthur. Anytime someone burns me I'm going to take a deep breathe and than look at the audience. Who cares about the 4th wall.

exhausted. Pull it together Bontekoe! You have to do a stand up show tonight.

WOW! Stand up tonight went a MILLION times better than last time :D And the Mise-en-scene at Comedy Theater is so much nicer than Comedy Cafe. Goed Gedaan Claartje! It was weird to recognize a joke being told in Dutch to realize it is an old Sinbad joke.

The first guest at my party is asleep :( Let's hope the later guests are more in the mood!

THANK YOU STEPHEN FOR BEING A WONDRFUL CHRISTMAS HOST!!!!!!! :D

"And nobody who fails to get fun out his activities can expect them to be fun for anyone else." Bertolt Brecht was right. I need to have some fun while writing my papers... What time does the liquor store open? I can be one of those writers.

Give away that Freaks and Geeks was not actually made in Michigan- One of the characters said Soda and not Pop.

I was suppose to work on papers all day. Instead I watched Freaks and Geeks. I can't decide if I'm proud or ashamed.

My roomie declared her hatred for cooked apples while I proclaimed my love for them, yet she ate an entire apple pie before I could get a slice. Oh, I love irony.

I have made a lot of empty promises in my life, but this is by far the most generous.

Carol Bontekoe is the new promoter for Boom Chicago. So if you are in Amsterdam give me a holla so I can hook ya up with a discount for the best comedy in town. (And it's in English! YAY!)

I was given a bottle of Moët & Chandon Nectar Imperial as a present! I don't know what I'm suppose to do with such a nice gift :D

Anyone who calls themself a Hipster is automatically a Douche Nasal.

2009, what can I say? You were random? 2010, BRING IT ON!

That is how I finished out 2009. Let's see what 2010 has in store for me.

Gebarentaal- Dutch Sign Language

2009-11-22T13:21:00.002+01:00

If you wanan learn how to do the alphabet in Dutch Sign Language here is a nice video to help you visualize:

Holidays

2009-11-15T22:12:00.001+01:00

Sinterklaas arrived in Amsterdam today. That means the Holiday season is here.

Here is one of my favorite Stand-up Comics talking about Holidays.

I miss that midwestern sense of humor.

Untitled Amsterdam

2009-11-07T15:23:00.001+01:00

Aesthetics of Colour

2009-10-15T18:08:00.002+02:00

An Exploration in color... or to use some of my snobby academia- Aesthetics of Colour

Flirting with Books

2009-10-13T11:43:00.005+02:00

I by no means of the imagination have any flirting skills. If I find myself attempting to flirt I panic, become very embarressed and avoid the guy for eternity. He probably just thinks I'm being weird, loud and sweaty- as usual.

When I find a guy flirting with me I become totally creeped out. I begin to wonder what is wrong with him? And what happened in his life that has lead him to the point where he is flirting with me? Did he have a head trauma as a child? I become rude and annoyed by these guys.

So, you can understand my suprise when lately I have found myself doing some flirting of my own. The biggest suprise is with who...er..what I'm flirting with. Lately I have found myself flirting with books.

See I have absolutely no money thanks to the amazing Dutch Banking system that I find myself trapped by. So, instead of just avoiding bookstores I end up hanging around them flirting with books I can't have.

If there is a piece of lint on them I sweetly brush it away. I look it up and down complementing its well chosen cover. And if things go really well I find myself fingering through it for the next hour.

I'm a bit of a tease with how much I come back to the bookstore and the time I spend with an individual book- I can see why they think they would get to come home with me. However, after I have had my fun and gotten some free reading in I end up going home alone. Back to the book I have waiting for me at home. Even when I'm laying in bed with my book I lay there imagining how much better it would be with the book from the store. To run my eyes over its un-doggy tagged pages. My eyes gazing from right to left and up and down. To slowly turn the pages with a lick of the finger and than a soft touch. Than I fall asleep with the book on my pillow just to dream- dreams of another.

A walking stereotype.

2009-10-07T12:50:00.018+02:00

Today we had to do an exercise on stereotypes. People wrote their stereotypes of a country and then they posted it under the name of that country. Countries like Latvia and Hungary were a little sparse. The United Kingdom was quite full, however I wrote about half of them: "Tea Drinkers", "Fancy themselves something special"and "Colonized the world in order to get some descent food" were just some of my beauties. I some how forgot bad teeth.
I was very surprised that when it came to America's turn that people started to clap. They were excited for us to address our stereotypes,since I would say Americans and Germans have the most unflattering stereotypes of any nations. I truly feel America is the only country in the world that EVERYONE in the world has some kind of opinion about.
There were three of us Americans, all very different. The first girl to speak is very tiny, always wears scarves, and when she talks she keeps her hands clenched in front of her unless to make a point she uses quotation mark fingers. She openly talks about how much she hates America and how embarrassing it is for her to have an American accent. Because of how tiny she is, the demeanor and her scarves she can blend into the scenery quite easily. She almost seems like she is hiding. She does not stand out at all. She finds it a high compliment to be told that she does not look American. She spoke first that the idea of Americans being fat, loud, and dumb is completely untrue. She said this with her back to me. Whether she did it consciously or unconsciously, she did it, and than tried to make the other girl in the group speak so as no one would notice the American Cliche standing directly behind her. I wasn't going to say anything but when she was so clearly trying to keep me out of it what could I do but be an obnoxious American and speak my mind? I said well I can see where these stereotypes come from since I am more or less all of the stereotypes. I even voted for Obama("Yes we can" and Obama were listed as stereotypes- I don't know how they are stereotypical.)
See even though I am the very embodiment of the American Stereotype I would say the other American girl that is running from being an American is re-enforcing these stereotypes more than I am. For an American to openly be saying, "Oh, I hate saying I'm from America. I hate my accent. I left and I'm never going back... ugh Americans(eye roll)" These things make people believe that these negative ideas of America are true and that they are justified in what they say about America. I find it irresponsible to push people towards thinking negatively of America.
I do not have the luxury of distancing myself from America at all costs. I'm American. Even if I am wearing the national dress of a country I am American. People can point to me from a distance a declare that I am American. Actually it has only been in the past month I have been perceived as anything other than American-most Dutch people at my university think I am South African, blame that on my DUTCH last name. I don't live abroad because I am trying to escape my homeland. I live abroad because of a fear of commitment- if I move to any place in the lower 48 than I'll be there for the rest of my life. For adventure. To learn about others cultures. On the side I try to re-educate people in their perception of America. Maybe I am what you think of as Typical American- even though in America I am far from typical. But am I really so bad? Am I really worth hate and anger towards Americans in general. I have often been told by people abroad that I am the first American they ever liked, all the others are horrible. That is when I have to ask, "Do you know any other Americans? No? We really aren't that bad. Some are. I will give you some suck; but that is true for every country, city, village, school, and family."
If you happen to be horrible behaving, uneducated, fat, ignorant, loud, conservative, who didn't have any fun till you were 21 and you are starting unjust wars-maybe you should say you are Canadian. But for those Americans living and traveling abroad who are educated,who try to learn the language, who know some geography- don't be afraid to say you are American. Own it. Help the world see that we are more than just the stereotypes. Even us stereotypical Americans need to show that those stereotypes are just the surface of wonderfully complex culture and country.

My4th of July party in Oudemirdum Friesland, Netherlands summer 2008. Showed everyone the best part of the 4th of July the parade and candy.

Spacebar

2009-10-06T00:20:00.004+02:00

Iattemptedtocleanmylaptop.Forthemostpartitwentwell,
exceptnowI'mgettingthefeelingmyspacebardoesn'tworkverywell.

3 Random things in Amsterdam

2009-10-01T22:20:00.007+02:00

These are three random things I saw around Amsterdam that basically make no sense to me.
The first is this cement dog sitting on a bridge. It is made to look like a bobble head from a distance but once I got next to it I saw you couldn't smack it in the head to make it bobble. So, what is the point? And why is it on the bridge? And on top of that there were actually two of them, the other was across the street.

Secondly in the self-proclaimed gayest city in Europe(and trust me they have competition) I still find this to be pretty gay. Not in the how stupid is that, but in the man on man love kind of gay. This is a "Rockin' Sailor" for children outside of a barber shop. Yes, cuz there is nothing cuter than putting little Johnny on top of a sailor to rock around with while men get their hair done.

And lastly a thing (thing because I have no actual words for it) that lead American Shock Comedian Doug Stanhope to say, "You don't need me here. My sense of humor is useless on people who have something like this for children to play in."
This bikini clad dismembered body lies in Oud Zuid the richest, poshest, and apparently most over the top part of town. This sits in a park near a school. It is for children to run around in- for fun. The door on the severed leg is open but you can see in the left hand corner how the doors are made to look like the insides of a human- the way they would look if the arms, legs, and head of a women at the beach had all been chopped off.
Oh, Amsterdam, I can't explain thee.

So Gay!

Elephant Parade

2009-09-26T11:33:00.005+02:00

Right now in Amsterdam there is a parade going on. An elephant parade.
Spread out over the city are over a 100 elephants, decorated by varying artists and celeberities. They are to raise money for Elephant Family, the largest Elephant charity in the world. They are a nice addition to the character of the city.

Click on the title of this entery if you want to learn more about the elephant parade or donate to the cause.

My bedding

2009-09-25T17:32:00.006+02:00

It took me a while to get my housing situation organized here in Amsterdam. De Key is the organization that international students get their housing from. When you are at De Key paying your rent and signing your lease they offer you some bedding for and additional 30 euros. I have to say I got suckered in because I was exhausted from trying to find a place and De Key dicking me around that I agreed to the 30 euro bedding. It all came in a small carrying box. That should have been a sign that it wouldn't be good.It is literally the cheapest bedding you can buy from IKEA. I spent 30 euros and when I got my IKEA catalogue I found my bedding in the catalogue for 6 euros.
I'm mostly over bitching about the bedding. Occasionally I feel the need to vent over the fact that I paid 6 times what I should have. So, here are some photos of my bedding and how I received it.

2009-09-20T02:51:00.003+02:00

As I laid on a bridge over prisengracht with my bike laying on top of me I realized something: I might not be able to bike as well I think I can. Especially after half a bottle of Bacardi Limon.
I had reached the point where I had no choice but to fall to the ground with my bike or run the bike into a canal. I feel I made the wise choice-as wise as you can make in that predicament.

Studying or being a Tourist

2009-09-13T15:14:00.005+02:00

I find it a little hard to get motivated to study here in Amsterdam. For my undergraduate degree I went to Michigan State University. While the campus is absolutely beautiful and the student body is an exciting and interesting group of people, it isn't exactly a tourist hot spot. Touristy things that can be done there are going to the Cheese Store, seeing a sporting event- if you can get tickets, and... well everyone over 21 should go to Crunchy's once.
Amsterdam on the other hand has tourist attractions out the wa-zoo. The museums, concerts, boat rides around the canals, theater, markets and so on; all saying, "Come on Carol. Go for a walk. Read this. Look at that. Smell that... Oh,no smelling that was a bad decision." All of this makes thinking about studying a little difficult. Sometimes I can combine my tourist in me with the student in me, like on a sunny day doing my reading in museumplein and go to plays as research for school. Sometimes, though the need to be a tourist in the city I live in overwhelms me and I need to go exploring. Yesterday I tagged along with couple other Student-Americans as we went to Vondelpark, the House of Bols, checked out the I AMsterdam sign, and ate and drank in museumplein. It was a really nice and lovely day, but now I need to get to studying to make up for my time as a tourist.

Dutch Logic

2009-09-11T12:08:00.005+02:00

Over time the Brits have come up with many terms using the word 'Dutch'. Often it is used in terms playing on negative stereotypes of the Dutch people.
Such phrases as:
Going Dutch or Dutch Treat- each person participating in an activity pays for himself or herself. So, gals it a guy asks you if you want a Dutch Treat sweetly decline.
Dutch Uncle- a person who issues frank, harsh, and severe comments and criticism to educate, encourage, or admonish someone.
Dutch Wife- a prostitute, Sex Doll, Water Bottle... more or less a substitute for a real wife in bed.
Dutch Courage- courage that is gained from drinking alcohol. I recently helped a girl I know get some Dutch Courage to jump the European Boy she is seeing(read: because he is European he is waiting for her to make the first move) by taking 5 jager shots on the street in about 8 minutes.
Dutch Oven- a pot you cook with that has a cover on top of it. A Dutch Oven can also be when someone farts and than traps someone else under the covers creating an enclosed stinky-ass area. It's truly one of the classiest things you can do to a loved one.
Out of all of these phrases I find Dutch Uncle to be the most telling and true for the Dutch people. People are always giving me really harsh advice here in order to help me. Glad I was an athlete most of my life so it doesn't phase me... too much.
While all of these phrases are great I would like to propose one more 'Dutch' word to be added to the list:
Dutch Logic- the complete lack of logic in any traditional or contemporary sense of the word.
I have come up with this term after three weeks of trying to get my excessive amounts of paper work that I need to live and study here in Amsterdam.
The latest predicament Dutch Logic has trapped me in is the need for health insurance. I am fine with getting Health Insurance here, it's actually affordable, the only problem is Dutch Logic. I need to get a residence permit to legally live, study, and work here. I need health insurance to get my residence permit. However, when I went to apply for health insurance it said I needed my residence permit to get health insurance... wait what?
I need a residence permit to get health insurance and I need health insurance to get my residence permit.
There is Dutch Logic for ya.
I have one more word Dutch Work Ethic but that'll have to be saved for another time. The Dutch with their 30 hour work weeks and the amazing ability to pass the blame onto just about anyone else sending me to 40 different places to get one simple thing done. Again, for another time. Ik wil een biertje.

Hurt Feelings

2009-09-10T22:31:00.003+02:00

I was being very middle school today and had hurt feelings because I felt left out of the cool group in the theatre dept. I came home put on flight of the conchords and this song came up and it mademe laugh so hard and get over my hurt feelings :)

across the way

2009-09-10T11:18:00.002+02:00

I have the habit of making uncomfortbaly long eye contact with people I shouldn't be making eye contact with, and than not looking people I should in the eye. I haven't had to walk past prostitutes too often- just on Wednesdays after class. I did however make the mistake of making eye contact with one gal who was trying to get a guy to come into her kamer. She than proceed to try and chat me up. I snapped out of my creepy eye contact and kept trudging along.
Well, last night I realized the woman sitting right across the way from me on the tram was the same prostitute I had made that unfortunate eye contact with. I knew it was her yet I again stared inappropriately till she looked up and we made eye contact AGAIN! That is when I really decided to focus on the beautiful city going past me.
For a major city Amsterdam is not that big. I re-run into people all the time, but I hadn't fully thought it out that I would be recognizing prostitutes on the tram. You never know who you are sitting next to. That's what makes living in the city so damn fun.

My City Amsterdam

2009-09-03T14:28:00.002+02:00

They showed us this video at my orientation for University of Amsterdam. You could spot ever American in the crowd as we all slowly slid down in our seats, popped up our collars, and combed our hair over our eyes as we glared at the floor. Bill O'Reilly is an idiot. Don't believe the false hype about this city.

Poor Man's Lobster

2009-07-09T06:42:00.001+02:00

t's hard to believe that anything involving Halibut could have a title involving "Poor Man's", but in Alaska you get used to it. With such an abundance of Halibut and Salmon-although this year has not been a good year- around people will just give away a few filets to a poor parking attendant(*Couch*me*Couch*). They have gotten very creative about how to cook Halibut up here in Homer Alaska-the Halibut Capital of the World.

Since I caught my first fish ever a tiny(by Alaskan Standards) 25lb Halibut I wanted to treat myself and some friends to some Poor Man's Lobster.

Here's how it goes:

You get some 7up and put it in a nice tall pot. place that pot on a stove. Turn on the stove and get a nice rolling boil going.

While the 7up is boiling chop up your halibut into nice cubes.

I recomend 1 1/2 inch cubes... but to be honest any size is fine.

Drop your halibut cubes into the boiling 7up.

Wait till they have cooked enough that they are floating on the top(give them a lil time at the top) than scoop them out.

Melt some butter.

Pour the butter on top and...

ta da

a yummy yummy meal that sort of tastes like Lobster- Use Real butter(look for the Real Seal) and you can never go wrong.

I hope you enjoy this Alaskan Treat.

I know my science nerd friends and I enjoyed it.

Changing the subject

2009-07-08T20:38:00.002+02:00

Back in Michigan when I wanted to change the subject I would simply say, "So, how about them Tigers." The statement was invariably followed with the other person yelling, "Fuck yeah the Tigers! Love those guys!" The subject would move on to a greatly detailed account of how great the Tigers are.
In Alaska this doesn't work too well. Someone will be ranting on about some uncomfortable subject and I try to change it by saying, "How about them Tigers." I will meet their blank gaze, watch them blink, and than listen as they say, "um yeah sure- Tigers? So, Back to what I was saying-...
For Alaskans the Tigers just won't cut it. People up here come from all over the place. They are people who couldn't take being told what to do, that's how you end up in Alaska. The one thing that can make any Alaskan change the subject is: Hippies.
Whether someone is old or young, rich or poor, conservative or liberal they all have very strong feelings about the overpopulation of Hippies up here. I will just yell out, "HIPPIES!" A conservative my might follow it up with, "Fucking Hippies..." A liberal with, "I love how many there are up here. The yurts they live in are cool..." I even find myself getting caught in my own subject change, "Old hippies who stuck with the principals they believe in cool. Great. At least they show that they have dedication to the cause. Neo-Hippies- any one under 58 trying to live the hippie lifestyle- I can't stand!" Most people, even the most conservative people, seem to agree with me and the uncomfortable topic of how to gut a moose has been changed.

Working the job not letting the job work me

2009-06-29T03:10:00.010+02:00

Last Wednesday was the lowest tide of the year. I was able to talk the higher ups at the police dept into letting me take a friend along in the ATV. My friend Howard is a Naturalist. He came with me to show me all the cool life that can be seen during a low tideI went from never having seen a Sea Star(commonly known as a Sea Fish) to having seen about 50.. I wore flip-flops(like always) while we walked along slick slippery rocks. I ended up biting it on a large rock. So, after Howard and I had walked a ways out on the slick rocks I tried to be smart and walk back to the shore on a sandbar. The sandbar eventually stopped and I tried to wade through what I thought was shallow water. It turned out I made my walk back to shore twice as hard as my walk out. I had to walk through nearly chest high water on top of slick rock with a huge amount of sea weed pulling me down. When I finally arrived to the shore with Howard and a couple that wanted tomake sure I didn't die(although who would they have called to save me? I'm the beach patrol.) were standing there watching me. I could feel my legs getting slashed open on the rocks, but it was so cold that it didn't really hurt. When I came out of the water I started to bleed everywhere. Howard and I walked back to the ATV I was muddy and bloody. There were a bunch of school children near by so Howard brought over a sun star to show them. I came with him and acted as if I didn't notice that my leg was completely red from the blood. .
I can only hope the children learned as much about sea stars that day as I did. And that they will remember that day as the day they saw a boat wreck survior walk onto the beach-not just some crazy stubborn lady who took the worst possible route to the beach.

Rose you coming?

2009-06-25T07:44:00.006+02:00

I just have to start out by saying I got a really good deal. Excellent in fact. I'm not one of those people with designer labels to show off. I have designer knock-offs and still like to brag about how cheap I got my wanna-be Dolce & Gabbana glasses in Mexico.
Recently at a garage sale to help the fire dept I got a TV for 50 cents! I was reluctant to buy it because we have no cable and it had a built in VHS player- I don't have any VHS anymore. The ladies were desperate to get rid of the last few things they had so they said they would throw in a box of VHS with the TV for another 50 cents. I looked through the box- I tossed aside Titanic and Ace Ventura and noticed Sleepless in Seattle and You've Got Mail. Sold! Sweatin' to the Oldies and the Baywatch movie- double sold!
I was so excited to have something to watch. I watched You've Got Mail and Sleepless in Seattle to the point that it wasn't fun to watch them anymore. I decided I should go through my big box of VHS and watch something else. The two tapes of Titanic were glaring at me. Refusing to be ignored. All I could remember of the movie was that I didn't like it, it was long, the music annoying and right before she pries his hand off of her and drops him in the ocean Rose says, "I'll never let go."
oh, and Kathy Bates is in it somewhere and the dude from Twister.
I felt it was time, after 12 years, to give the movie a second chance. I ended up watching the movie with my roomie Liz and my friend Christi. Our reaction to the film was considerably different than what it was 12 years earlier. Although I was an angry and bitter 13 year old when the movie came out I was not yet a jaded-single-female. A women who has dated and loved her share of losers. At 13 I just thought the movie was kinda stupid. Now at 25 I am 8 years older than what the main character-Rose is suppose to be in the movie. Now I just wanted to give her some tips about relationships. My friend Christi is a bit younger and nicer than my older roommate Liz and I. Christi briefly tried to defended Jack and Rose's love. Liz and I shouted our life lessons at the 50 cent screen.
"He's GAY Rose!"
"Married. Married with two children back in Wisconsin!"
"He is a male prostitute for the men shoveling coal in the bottom of the boat."
"Rose, come on! He "hung out" with French Prostitutes. He just gave you chlamydia!"
Again I don't really remember what I yelled at the screen 12 years ago but I'm 98% sure none of these made it. Especially since thanks to the movie Sleepers and my cousin Kent reading the Swedish Subtitles I had only learned what a BJ was a month before I saw the movie. Although later on that year I learned a lot more about BJs thanks to the GOP being obsessed with Clinton's love life and cable news networks.
Twelve years ago I had no idea why she would jump back on the boat. Why would she be so willing to die with him? I finally figured it out after a long debate over whether or not Rose came in the back of the car. We said he was probably a two pump chump. Than I realized she must have come. There is no way a girl would jump back on to a sinking ship for some guy who didn't make her come.
Yeah, for the jaded-single-twentysomething-female of the 21st century this idea of a innocent love worth dieing for doesn't make sense. Than you remind yourself it's a movie... Rose is only suppose to be 17. SEVENTEEN! What the heck does she know?
Your best love stories are the short ones. There the only ones that don't get jaded with the truth of time.

Carol

2009-06-16T09:57:00.003+02:00

I think I have finally come up with the most narcissistic thing that someone can do. I think it is making love to a bunch of songs with your name in it. There are some songs named Carol... most of them revolving around how great the girl named Carol is. Put together they make about a 25 minute playlist.
That got me thinking that would make a perfect gettin' it on playlist... till the creepiness of wanting to do that sunk in.

Oh, yeah baby... want me to get you in the mood? Marvin Gaye? No we don't have that.... But I do have a selection of songs that feature my name. What do you mean, what do I mean? They are all songs about a girl named Carol. No they're good songs... What's weird about that? Why are you getting dressed?

Maybe I won't be do that anytime soon.
But I can dream that someday I'll find someone who loves me as much as I love myself so we can make love to a song that includes the lyrics:
Oh Carol I think it's time for running for cover
Believe me, you're everyone's and nobody's lover

while looking up lyrics to Carol songs I noticed that Chuck Berry says:
Oh Carol don't let HIM steal your heart away
yet The Rolling Stones remake says:
Oh Carol don't let HER steal your heart away.
Why GOD?!
Why is there always the implication that I'm a lesbain.... maybe doing it to songs named Carol wouldn't be as great as I imagined.

Dax is still my karaoke Nemesis

2009-05-22T10:57:00.002+02:00

I'm going to skip right past the fact that I will turn in 4 sheets for 4 different songs and than Dax will have the balls to come up to me and say, "You going to sing tonight?" And still not call me!
No that would be petty to point out these kind of things.

Dax decided to make fun of Susan Boyle tonight. He put on an ugly dress and a bra with a ugly wig. Than he made fun of the fact that the video of Susan Boyle singing I Dreamed the Dream(see below if you haven't seen the video yet)got over 9 million hits in less than a month. I guess it didn't cross his mind that it has been watched so many times because people are pulling for Susan Boyle. So, he proceeded to sing I dreamed the dream terribly and grabbing himself inappropriately the whole time. I think when no one is laughing along with you grabbing your junk is the most desperate move ever.
The tension in the bar was thick. In one swoop he totally changed the mood of the bar. I have only ever been in that uncomfortable of a mood in a bar once before. In California when a comic-who used to be on SNL- kept saying the N word over and over again. People asked him to stop but he kept going and saying N this N that. I feel it should be mentioned that comic is white.
I guess it hadn't crossed Dax's mind that the people in the bar can only hope to be like Susan Boyle someday. There are some AMAZING singers at karaoke here in Homer. I think they hope that someday they can go to a talent competition and over night become an international sensation.
You could feel that people wanted to boo him. There was just one problem with that- he gets to decide who sings next. So, what can you do? Just sit silently. Turn your back, like I and many other people did.
All I can say is go ahead Susan do your thing! And to all the Homerites: isn't Dax a total Douche Nasal?

That's just how I feel.

2009-05-16T19:17:00.007+02:00

I love Nick Drake.
I just want to get that off my chest before typing-I can't listen to Nick Drake.
His music makes me too sad. Too moody. I often refer to his music as Melancholy music(I like to feel as if I'm in a Shakespearean play sometimes)
The definition of Melancholy from Merriam-Webster is:
1 a: an abnormal state attributed to an excess of black bile and characterized by irascibility or depression b: black bile c: melancholia
2 a: depression of spirits : dejection b: a pensive mood

A depression of spirits...Definitely... In case you are like me and have no idea what that Black Bile stuff is all about I looked it up:
Black Bile- a humor of medieval physiology believed to be secreted by the kidneys or spleen and to cause melancholy
If you are like me you want to move past this, because you still have no idea.
anyway...

I feel that the fact that I feel Melancholy while listening to his music is a testament to how amazing his music really is. He killed himself when he was my age and when you listen to the music you can see why and if you listen to it for too long you start to contemplate it yourself. That's AWESOME! That means he was so good he got you to truly feel what he was going through.

The thing is I can listen to really melancholy music, I just need it jazzed up a bit. I love music that has a jazzy beat and has just the saddest lyrics. One of my favorite examples of this kind of music is Blind Melon's No Rain.
With its little snaps and wooooooooooooooooooo oo oo oo ooooooooooooooooooo oo oo oo ooooooooooooooo and cool 90's sound it's easy to over look lyrics like:

And I don't understand why I sleep all day
And I start to complain that there's no rain
or
Its not sane......it's not sane

The latter goes on for a long time of him singing its not sane
That's quite sad. Yet if I hear this song in the bar I'm singing right along snappin' with one hand holding my beer in the other.

I have tons of examples but I will just give one more:
Stephen Stills-Love the One You're With
It so upbeat sounding that you can't help but bop and jive(bop and jive...what am I sixty?) along with the music. Once you start actually listening to the lyrics it is so sad. It's all about settling for someone.

Don’t be angry, don’t be sad, and don’t sit cryin’ over good times you’ve had. There’s a girl right next to you, and she’s just waitin’ for something to do.
and the most famous part
and if you can’t be with the one you love, honey, love the one you’re with, love the one you’re with, love the one you’re with, love the one you’re with.

Sometimes when I hear this song I imagine a couple sitting together in the car and this song comes up. The man turns up the music and looks at the girl and says, "Yep, definitely. This should be our wedding song"

Pot Luck Wednesday

2009-05-14T10:28:00.002+02:00

On Wednesday nights my friends and I get together to have a pot luck. They are held at my soon to be apartment. There is nothing really in the apartment because Liz(my soon to be roomie) and myself have been living out of backpacks for years.
Today Liz ran out of paper towels. I had for gotten my towel at the apartment Saturday night. When I showed up to the pot luck tonight I noticed my towel sitting on a kitchen counter. I moved it over and way from the counter since that is my end of my shower towel. Sitting near the food we were about to eat and being used to dry off the dish we were about to eat from didn't seem right.
I hadn't noticed that Liz had taken back the towel to the kitchen area. Our token boy Max was using the towel to dry off his hands. I asked, "Is that my towel?" Liz reluctantly said that it is my towel.
"Why is it back in the kitchen?"
No answer.
That's when I decided to say a real party killing sentence.
"I USE THAT TO DRY OFF MY NAKED BODY. ALL OF IT!"
Max decided to put down the towel and re-wash his hands.
Bathroom towels and kitchen towels are not interchangable things.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

2009-05-10T22:40:00.002+02:00

To my great scrabble/boggle buddy. My mom!

Flickr

2009-05-04T20:28:00.005+02:00

I love Flickr. I admit it. I think Flickr is the best of all the photo websites. Since I am someone who needs constant validation Flickr is right up my alley.
On Flickr you can post your photos within different groups. Than other people can give you "awards". The "awards" give me an inflated sense of myself.
I don't just get to receive awards I also get to give Awards away. The power is intoxicating. I get to bestow awards upon others. Decide whether their photos are worthy of me copying and pasting an award in the comment box.
Lately I've been given a daily project to do each day. My friend Becky asked me to do a 365 day self portrait challenge with her. I love it. It makes sure I take my camera with me and I'm always looking for different ways to take a picture of myself. Today is my 12th. What will I decide to take a picture of myself doing? I don't know yet. That's what makes it so much fun. I think I do a pretty good job updating this blog, I have to say I do a GREAT job updating my self portraits. So, if you just aren't getting enough of me here you can get even more of me through my self-portraits.

These are my friend Becky's Self Portraits. They are pretty amazing:

My friend MAndy also decided that this looked like fun and got in on the fun too. Her photos are awesomely artsy:

I love the difference between all of our Self Portraits. It think it shows the differences in all of our personalities, the way we see the world, and ourselves.
Who else wants to get involved? It's fun! :)

Something is wrong with this story.

2009-05-04T10:53:00.002+02:00

I checked out a new church today. So long as I have been living in Homer, AK I have been attending the United Methodist Church. There is a slight age discrepancy between me and the majority of the congregation. A mere 40-50 years difference. I often feel a bit isolated and alone within the church. I arrive alone, I sit alone, and than after church during fellowship hour I stand alone with a plate full of cheese. One step away from literally being the cheese stands alone.
A couple weeks ago I talked three friends into going with me. Than last week as I was crafting away one of my friends who had visited my church made some jokes about the age difference. Another friend suggested I come and check out her church that is held in the gym of an elementary school in town. She informed me that it is a bit more youthnized.
I told me pastor and some others last night that I would be checkin' out the "Rock Church" in town. They said that was good and I should check out the church.
Well, umph.
If you aren't going to even put up a fight for your only 20/30/40 something within the church than I will go and check it out.
The "Rock Church" has all the hip elements of the groovy new churches. A Rock Band, Lighting, a projector, pastors that are middle aged but dress like moody emo teenagers(i.e. Rob Bell). All of it.
The thing is I have no idea what the pastor's message was. None what so ever. Yet, his sermon might be one of the all time most memorable sermons I have ever heard.
There was something about Leviticus in there but the part I will remember was a story from his youth. When he was 14 he was driving across country with his uncle and cousin. This is when he had his first driving experience. His uncle asked him if he wanted to sit on his lap and drive.
wait...
what?
No. That can't be right.
I looked around. People weren't looking in disgust and whispering. That just led me to believe they weren't really paying attention. I turned to my friend Liz and she started laughing too. She was listening.
He was 14... and his uncle let him sit on his lap and drive. We aren't talking about a 7 year old. At 14 while you might not be fully grown you surely don't have to sit on someone lap to drive. Heck, farm kids can get certain kinds of licenses at 13. I was 6' by the age of 10. My brothers were driving the car to school around the same age, until the school called me mom. I have no plans on asking my nieces and nephews to sit on my lap and drive when they are teenagers. How did they even fit?
I couldn't listen to anything else. I was just thinking that his uncle was wildly inappropriate and he doesn't even seem to realize it. Neither did the couple hundred people sitting in this little gym. And why at 14 wasn't he aware that your uncle asking you to sit on his lap is not okay. What about his cousin? His Uncle's son sitting there in the car? Was no one aware how inappropriate this whole thing was?! Why is he telling us this?! IS he trying to be funny about a molesting uncle?!
No one else seemed to be as tramatized by what he had said as I clearly was. I tried to make up reasons for why a 14 year old would sit in his uncles lap to drive. Reasons that people must be telling themselves so no one has to deal with this extremely revealing story. He was tiny. Teeny...Tiny...Itsy...bitsy. That's it. Until he was in his 20s people thought he was a midget. Yeah... than he had this freakish growth spirt where suddenly he caught up to everyone else. And now no one ever knows except, when he tells his sitting-on-his-uncle's-lap-at-14 story, that he used to be a teeny weeny teenager.
Sure.
That has to be it!
I can pay attention again.
Oh, Sermon is over.
Ready for some Bon Jovi-esque Christian Rockin'.
I'm totally going again. You never know what weird hidden detail from his past we will try to just clip in next week.

Settling in

2009-05-03T08:51:00.003+02:00

I finally got to play Settlers of Catan tonight. I have been waiting ever since I moved to Alaska to get someone to play with me.
I got 4 people to play with me in fact. Don't want to brag but I'm pretty hip around here with the 50+ crowd.
At church tonight there was a game night and since I have been waiting 5 cold months to play Settlers I had to bring it along. It's weird trying to get people to play games around here. During the winter everyone says it's too cold to go anywhere. Than once it gets nice out it's too nice to go and play a board game. It never seems to be the right weather for a board game.
It was funny play with some older people. I kept being told was nothing like the games they grew up with. I was had to keep saying that's what makes this game so great. I warned them that it is highly addictive. The proof is in my friends and family who almost all own the game and play whenever thy get the chance.
Pastor Charles could easily fit in with my family when playing. He isn't got the idea of the trading and was one of the best and most aggressive traders I have ever seen. People were trying to be nice while playing. I had never experienced that. I'm used to the go for the jugular playing of 318 Elm Place and at family get-togethers.I knew Pastor Charles would like the game while we were playing Scrabble. He kept trying to trade letters, a natural Settlers player.
One of my favorite parts of coming home is playing games. ONe of the things that makes living far away, not playing games. One of the elderly ladies said she would teach me a game called sequence sometime. I'm down. I love that Homer feels more like home everyday.

timing is everything

2009-04-30T09:11:00.005+02:00

I know I need to write about Sam's visit to Alaska. It was amazing and I had an uber good time. But when there is so much t write about I can't seem to get the focus to go ahead and do it.
I do just want to take a moment here to say that today I experienced the most perfectly timed Earthquake ever!
I was at a dinner party, Asian themed. Just anything Asian. I didn't feel like cooking so I classed it up by bringing a bottle of Sake, a box of fortune cookies, and a half eaten carrot cake that was given to me for giving a lecture about Kyrgyzstan(a country in... Asia).
The dinner was at my dance instructor's-Breezy- house. Not a dance activity but that is how I know her. The house is A-mazing! It is this beautiful wood house. Rustic with an amazing view of the bay. This is not a house for a young adult. She was telling us that the house was her grandfather's and he had died in the house. We had noticed that one of the many stuffed animals in the house was not facing the same direction it was when we had first come in. Breezy said she thinks her Grandfather is still in the house. We all joked around that he just starts moving stuff for kicks and to remind people he was still around.
All of a sudden EVERYTHING started to shake. It only last for a few seconds but it was a good size earthquake. We all sat there staring at each other. Was it an Earthquake? Or was it Grandpa trying to remind everyone he's still in charge.
We decided it was a earthquake. Realizing it was an earthquake only mildly relived the eeriness of the timing. We than realized if it's an earthquake we should look out Grandpa's giant window looking over the bay and keep on eye on the water. If it started reseeding quickly an old ghost shaking the house would be the least of our worries. For along with angry ghosts, volcanoes, and earthquakes... we also have to keep a look out for Tsunamis.
I love living in Alaska.

You NEED to watch these.

2009-04-17T23:43:00.004+02:00

I know I normally make post of stuff I find funny and call it a day but you gotta watch this. Susan Boyle has become a sensation in the past couple of weeks out of a small village in Scotland. The link is to Susan Boyle's appearnce on Britian's Got Talent(imagine American Idol-Simon is even on it) People laughing and snickering at her. It's absurd. The arrogance to assume cuz someone doesn't fit a certain look that they must have no talent. She seems to be a simple country gal who gets confused easily... but don't let that foul ya.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnmbJzH93NU

This is a sound recording from a charity album she sang for back in 1999. I hput it on repeat for about an hour. It is fantastic!

There are tons of ugly male singers who don't live up to a cookie cutter image of beauty. It's nice to finally see a female who is steping out of her village to show you never know where talent is.

Side note about me....Cuz Ilike to bring all things back to myself. I spent a day lawn bowling in Scotland...in her home town. One of my favorite days ever.

Whad up dog?

2009-04-16T05:16:00.001+02:00

Just wanted to post this little rap that Caitlin left me on my Facebook Wall:
they call her c to the roll, she's outta control, firstsecondthird world, got that travelin soul. / put a mic in her hand, she'll blow you awayyy, buildmeup buttercup, what more can i sayyy. / best friend you'll ever find, she'll take away your fearrrs, but mess with carolspacelynn, she gon' leave you in tearrrs. / droppin bows droppin game, all over your faaace, shotputs her life to the top, makin herself a naaame....

My homies know how I roll. :)

quotas and Karaoke Nemesis

2009-04-11T07:22:00.008+02:00

It's Friday night and I'm in. I'm in because I want to be in, yet I feel like I should be out. Sometimes when Friday/Saturday roll around I feel like I NEED to be out, even if I have no desire to be out at a smoky bar. It is my inner insecure 15 year old girl screaming at me to go out. That old idea that you need to be out on a Friday and Saturday night or you aren't popular. I'm 25 and single with no kids so maybe I should still have that philosophy, the thing is I usually have a 2 day going out quota. As long as I go out two days in the week I feel like I have a social life going. Most of my life two nights in the week was all I had available to go out.
Tomorrow I'll be out all day for hopefully a very fun day so that is 1 day out. On Thursday I saw The Reader(see below) on Tuesday I went to Condom Craft Night(see further below) and on Monday I went out and defeated my Karaoke Nemesis. So, quota for the week has already been met.
Oh, did I mention a Karaoke Nemesis?
Why yes I did.
I tried to slip it in but I see you caught that.
If you are a regular reader you will remember my Karaoke Nemesis.
If you are new to reading my blog click on the title to this post and you can read about the beginning of this rivalry.
After Michigan State's devastating loss to North Carolina on Monday I wasn't ready to just call it a night and head home and sulk. First my friend Jana and I went out and had the best burger I have had since moving to Alaska. Than I was able to talk her into going to Karaoke with me. I had to finally face-off with Dax, the man that dared to tell me I don't know crazy karaoke.
I promised Jana I would only sing one song and than we could go. I almost believed it myself. But karaoke is like chips you can't just stop at one. I eventually roped in Jana's friend Tex(who is from Washington) to sing some songs to prolong the karaoking Madness.mwhahahaha
okay I went to a Count from Sesame Street place for a second.
The thing is the Karaoke was far from madness. It was also far from crazy. It was regular. When I got my shot to take over the microphone I knew I had to rock it. I have been toying with the idea of adding "The Distance" by Cake into my repertoire, but for my first song I had to go with one I knew I could rock. Dax is known for cutting off people and changing their songs and kicking them off stage if they aren't good singers. He had also kind of blown me off before it all started when I said I had come to do some karaoke. I ended up opening with, no surprise, Build Me up Buttercup. The crowd went wild, again no surprise. After I finished Dax said, "Wow! We need more people like Carol!"
Point for me.
I didn't sign up for a second song because I really did intend to stick to my promise of one song. Eventually there was a point where no one was signed up for a song. How does that happen at the craziest karaoke in the world? Because Dax was being heckled(mostly from my table-not by me I was stony silent-Tex and Jana let him have it) he decided not to sing another cheesy song where he changes the words to be about Homer. He eventually found his way over to my table. And got me to sing again. I feel he was trying to embarrass me. To try and reclaim some power. I agreed. Bring it. A Ms. Sara Lutz signed me up for "I Believe I Can Fly" once and I brought it. He played "Don't Stop Believin'" Can't embarrass me with a song that I have rocked many a time.
I had a Michigan State Shirt on with a "Go State!" sign on the back of my shirt. When I did the "From south Detroit" part I turned so the crowd could read my "Go State" sign. And than I did it again at the "Some will Lose" and had a really sad face... Still I rocked the shit out of that song.
Point for me.
After I was all done Dax proclaimed, "Carol where have you been? We need you here all the time!"
Point for me!
And in your face be-otch!
I got Tex to sing "Friends in Low places" by himself and than talked him into doing "Bohemian Rhapsody" with . Dax said this was a sacrificial song, a song that people glutton for punishment sing.
Guess what Tex and I did? Yeah We totally rocked it.
I'm giving myself 5 points for that.
IT was getting time to leave and I just want to sing "Sweet Caroline" a song I never get to sing. Tex needed to go and I got him to agree to stay through an insanely drunk girl's rendition of "Dirty Deeds" if we went right after her. I went up to chat with Dax about getting in one more song. He said he could do it but I had to do something for him. He than puffed out his cheek and tapped on it. I acted as if I haven't had creepy old men all over the world give me this move. My eyes got all big and became glazed over with question marks.
"Ummm, ahhh" I then puffed out my cheeks and pretended to be a blow fish.
He looked at me and then said, "Do you want the song? Cuz you gotta do something for me."
I tightened up my face and did it.
Damn you Dax! You brought me down a peg.
Point for Dax.
He tries to pull that shit again I'm out of there.
Tex and I did rock it good enough to get the one man left in the audience to applaud.
So I take back my point.
Dax...my Karaoke Nemesis... I don't feel I can call you that anymore. You suck and I'm pretty amazing.And I'm really modest about my skills. It's beneath me to have you as a nemesis. You think that it is all about the voice and as I have preached to people all over the world, Karaoke has nothing to do with your voice but the show you put on. This was far from crazy karaoke. To me crazy karaoke is Crunchy's right before our whole table gets kicked out because Sara is kicking someone, Tom keeps singing with people who don't want his help, and I like to show people how fast I can drink by using their drinks to demonstrate. It's giant sing-a-longs. Dax. You don't know what I've seen. And how hard I can rock it, I half assed it for ya! But my friend Sam is coming, so I'll be back. And I will destroy you again.

Side effect of Volcanic Ash.

2009-04-10T09:30:00.004+02:00

My friend Elizabeth and I went to see "The Reader" tonight and were greeted with several surprises. I don't want to give away too much of the movie but I will say if you were ever interested in getting a good look at Kate Winslet's breasts, you will have ample opportunity in this film. They are out there for about half the movie. If you were thinking I would enjoy watching a soft core porn, but are embarrassed at anyone finding out that you are watching a soft core porn than this is the movie for you. Soft Core Porn with a great story to come along.
The biggest surprise was waiting for us as we entered the theater. We had to remove our shoes and leave them by the door. We cracked jokes with other audience members about pretending we were at a slumber party. The owner of the theater must have heard everyone making so many jokes and came out to explain that the ash will make the film reels catch on fire. So, that is why we needed to take off our ash covered shoes.
I have seen a film catch fire once before in Phoenix Arizona 007 was rapping up is escapades and the entire picture melted away. Got two free tickets for it.
I enjoyed having an excuse to take off my shoes in the movie theater. It is perhaps the only perk of having everything covered in ash.

Bill Murray knows that Bill Murray is not funny, and so should you.

2009-04-09T23:26:00.002+02:00

Okay I know I'm posting stuff from other people instead of myself for the second. But these people are more talented and brilliant than I'll ever be so I just need to post another thing. This is Bill Murray on his first season of SNL. It's hilarious and feels very intimate. It's especially funny knowing the star he later became.

My Favorite MAd TV Sketch

2009-04-09T21:00:00.002+02:00

I like Mad TV. I know that isn't a popular thing to say and that is why the show is going off the air. However, this year featured my favorite sketch on the entire show. It's a parody of that ridiculously annoying song, "I Kissed A Girl". You need to watch this is an amazing Ellen impression:

OP-ED from New York Times about Iowa

2009-04-09T20:23:00.002+02:00

My whole life my mother, who is from Iowa, has told me that people from Iowa are just naturally better people than all other people. Modest too. Nothing I ever saw supported the things she said. However, this past week and this op-ed are helping understand what my mom has been talkign about.
I have to admit I got a little misty eyed reading this. GOOD JOB IOWA! Equal Rights for all:

April 9, 2009
Op-Ed Contributor
Iowa’s Family Values
By STEVEN W. THRASHER
IF it weren’t for Iowa, my family may never have existed, and this gay, biracial New Yorker might never have been born.

In 1958, when my mother, who was white, and father, who was black, wanted to get married in Nebraska, it was illegal for them to wed. So they decided to go next door to Iowa, a state that was progressive enough to allow interracial marriage. My mom’s brother tried to have the Nebraska state police bar her from leaving the state so she couldn’t marry my dad, which was only the latest legal indignity she had endured. She had been arrested on my parents’ first date, accused of prostitution. (The conventional thought of the time being: Why else would a white woman be seen with a black man?)

On their wedding day, somehow, my parents made it out of Nebraska without getting arrested again, and were wed in Council Bluffs, Iowa, on March 1, 1958. This was five years before Nebraska would strike down its laws against interracial marriage, and almost a decade before the Supreme Court would outlaw miscegenation laws throughout the country in Loving v. Virginia.

When the good state of Iowa conferred the dignity of civic recognition on my parents’ relationship — a relationship some members of their own families thought was deviant and immoral, that the civil authorities of Nebraska had tried to destroy, and that even some of my mom’s college-educated friends believed would produce children striped like zebras — our family began. And by the time my father died, their interracial marriage was seen just as a marriage, and an admirable 45-year one at that.

That I almost cried last week upon reading that the Iowa Supreme Court overturned the state law banning same-sex marriage will therefore come as no surprise. I’m still struck by one thought: over the years, I’ve met so many gay émigrés who felt it was unsafe to be gay in so-called flyover country and fled for the East and West coasts. But as a gay man, I can’t marry in “liberal” New York, where I’m a resident, or in “liberal” California, where I was born, and very soon I will have that right in “conservative” Iowa.

Of course, the desire to define relational rights and responsibilities with a partner, to have access to the protection that this kind of commitment affords, is rather conservative. But it’s a conservative dream that should be offered to all Americans. Though it takes great courage for gays to marry in a handful of states now, one hopes that someday, throughout the nation, gay marriages, like my parents’ union, will just be seen as marriages.

It’s safe to say that neither the dramas of our family, nor its triumphs, could have been possible without the simultaneously radical and conservative occasion of my parents’ civil marriage in Iowa. And so when the time comes, I hope to be married at the City Hall in Council Bluffs, in the state that not only supports my civil rights now, but which supported my parents’ so many years ago.

Condom Craft Night

2009-04-09T07:17:00.009+02:00

Every Tuesday at Kharacters(a bar here in Homer) there is a craft night. This week is Sex Education week at the bar, so the theme for Craft Night was Condom Crafts. I went with two new friend,:Elizabeth and Bryan. We made a variety of crafts in an attempt to win a prize or two.
Here are some of the ones that didn't place:

Elizabeth sign has the Condoms as "O"s and at the bottom it says, "Safe Sex Wins."
Bryan made the most disproportionate women in the world. Makes Barbie's measurements seem possible.

My Condom-nose Pig Mask. I love this thing. I have it hanging on my fridge now.

The Evil Butterfly.

When they were announcing the winners the said first runner-up, second runner-up,third...
There was no real consistency with the places. We thought they had announced all the places and were gathering our things to get going. I was bummed we didn't win anything between the three of us. I was in the bathroom and heard the "Slug" had finished second. I had already told Rudy, the judge, that it was a snail... a slug doesn't have a shell. But who cares, we placed! I finished up my business and came running out saying, "whada we win? whada win? That was our snail!" Rudy stared for a second and than said, "The slug is yours? She said it was hers." Bryan, Elizabeth and I all turned and looked at a girl that was going through a little baggy of prizes. Bryan and Elizabeth were calmer than me I just went ahead and shouted, "Those are our prizes! You didn't make the slug!"
She didn't even bother to fight us as we gathered up our prices. Elizabeth and I each took something we wanted and left the rest for Bryan. I am now the owner of a comical long Jagermeister lanyard. It feels good to be a winner.
mwhahahahaha

Keeping Ebay at bay.

2009-04-05T12:48:00.004+02:00

As some of you may know I have been on a bit of a Ebay bidding kick. I say bidding and not shopping because I like to low ball bid to feel apart of all the excitement, damn well knowing I won't get the stuff. I won't go into too many details but some of my lowballs actually won.
I am now the owner of two sets of pearls, two pairs of lacoste sunglasses, and a pair of vintage Armani aviator sunglasses. I think I will be uncomfortable having designer shades on. I traditionally buy cheap shades cuz I lose or break them. My most recent ones being from Mexico in a buy 2 for 9 dollar set. My friend Caitlin owns the other half of that set. They were broken a month ago....mysteriously... though some suspect them being at the bottom of my laundry pile and me stepping on them had some thing to do with it... but those are just speculations on my specs(I wasn't planning on going to that cheesy of a place, but once I was there I couldn't turn back.)
I need to take a minute here and talk to my larger gals. So, skinny girls...dudes feel free to go eat a donut through this next section, you can catch up later.
If you are the kind of lady who would type in Plus Size Dress into Ebay than you should never, ever, never, never, never be looking at this dress to buy:

Yeah... on ebay you can find THIS dress under Plus Size Dress. Not just in 2X but also in 3X! Sorry ladies... actually I take that back, for once in my midwestern politness riden life I am not sorry... LADIES! Yeah I just type-yelled "Ladies"... I needed to make sure your full atttention was on me. Do.not.buy.this.dress!
It will not make you look sexy, it will not make the good times roll. It'll just get a lot of stares, jokes, and an incrediably uncomfortable vibe.
Okay, any of you girls who aren't plus size you can start reading again, how was that Donut? hey! Plus size come back here, I'm not done. You can get your donut later. Regular size gals, girls with little boobs, women with real boobs, ladies who are not models... there is a dress posted above. You don't need to read the text, but please don't wear this dress in public. Ask yourself, could my dad be proud of me in this dress? Even if you were winning the Noble Peace prize and decided to except it in this dress, could he be proud of you? If this answer is, "no" than you probably shouldn't be wearing it.
Guys, you can come back. Oh, you had time for two donuts? Well good for you. oh, you saw some slammin' bitch the other day? yeah... sure, motorboatin' son-of-a-bitch...original. Ashton Kutcher is your role model? Demi Moore is one fine Cougar. Red Soxes, Baby? Well I'm really more of a Tigers fan...YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH ABOUT THE TIGERS... FINE! We'll agree to disagree. Your Frat bro did that once? cool. No, I don't know Petey...

Guys, I can't believe how much effort we go through to get your attention...

Vegas.com

2009-04-01T04:54:00.002+02:00

I have to say, even though my Mama always said never to use the word "Hate", I HATE the Vegas.com commercial. I find it extremely annoying. I have included it at the bottom but in case you have an extremely slow computer like mine I'll tell ya about the commercial. It basically is following around a Show Reviewer for Vegas.com and all that he has to do in a day. He has a segway that he is riding around on going from show to show and sitting in the best seats. The guy is pretty dumpy but is constantly surrounded by beautiful women.
What makes this commercial so bad and annoying is that the whole time the guy in the commercial is extremely bored. He is so uninterested in everything that he is doing. He seems annoyed at having to go to shows and review them.
How does this make anyone want to go to Vegas? It certainly doesn't make me want to go...I mean I'm not that interested in going back anytime soon... but that commercial doesn't make me want to go every, especially if it is as boring as this guy is leading us to believe.
I would have liked to go to Vegas this past week because my friends Tom and Shawn(a Girl) were both in Vegas. if I had been there I could have followed through with my brilliant plan of setting them up and having them fall in love and get married. And what better place than Vegas for that? They could have fallen in love and gotten married in the same weekend in Vegas... The way marriage is suppose to be entered into, as a drunken dare at the end of a long day.
Since life is not a Chick Flick, Tom and Shawn didn't run into each other and get married...
Maybe someday...
until than I will keep hating the guy in the vegas.com commercials....
and enjoying life...

Twouble with Twitters

2009-03-25T02:15:00.001+01:00

I recommend you read my post "Being deep in a 140 Characters or less" before watching this video. But this is so funny and totally spot on about Twitter:

A Moose is Loose

2009-03-23T01:40:00.001+01:00

I give my best moose face.

Being Deep in 140 characters or less

2009-03-22T10:01:00.007+01:00

Twitter is the new "it" thing that the media is latching on to. Especially with the poorly behaved and patently uncool politicians using Twitter at inappropriate times. For those that don't know Twitter is micro-blogging... or just a more self-serving version of a blog. I write in this mostly to keep track of my life for myself. I go back and read old entries to realize how far I have come.
Oh... no I mean I write this for my dozen or so loyal readers... I live for you people and your comments fuel my soul... forget the part where I said it was for me. I like imagining I have a legion of fans, despite having no talents. I feel this is the same mind set that people on reality shows have.
What was I typing about?

That's Right.
I'm on Twitter. I even use it. Mostly since I'm not smart enough to use the new Facebook and still want to use some kind of technology type thing that people my age are supposedly all doing... I watch Cable news...they always let me know what people my age are doing.
I mostly use Twitter to look for good travel deals, check up on my two friends who are on it, and get my sports stats for MSU and all my Detroit teams. However, I "follow" a fellow RPCV(Returned Peace Corps Volunteer). I won't use his name. Not because he'll be reading this-I am a 100% sure he won't. And not to protect his identity from other RPCVs, because I'm pretty sure they could figure out who it is without my help(Guesses will be accepted). No I won't write his name cuz I can barely stand to acknowledge I read the crap he writes. I feel if I type his name I some how validate him. I can't do it. Don't ask me to.

Boring people like Jimmy Fallon use Twitter to write such interesting things as:
"national lampoon radio hour" is a required listen
I forgot how much I love radio...
Happy Saturday. Making a homemade Sausage McMuff

I make fun yet I am boring on Twitter too(everyone is)I write important things like:
"Couldn't figure out where I knew a girl from tonight and convinced her we hung out the night before, she ended up being my dance teacher"
"80s pop is like comfort food to me."
"Gave a 13 year old girl advice about navigating through high school politics. I almost forgot how how good I was at it back than."

Real hard hitting stuff there.

The Un-named RPCV, however, uses Twitter as a way of trying to show the world how deep he is. In the same vain as Aristotle just limited to 140 characters. I find it annoying, arrogant, and frankly I don't understand most it. Here is a sampling of his Tweets(these aren't even as bad as some of the others I just picked his last ten to save time):
"People seem to be more willing to wait for something they believe in. Hot dogs, love, democracy, art, shoes, etc."
"There's the image I want to have, the image I project, and the person I am. Somewhere in all three is me."
"To the tune of 50 folk guitars: "I will find the wind and let the colors become my only lens." In the words, people. In the music, spirit."
"So polished he's stale. So unique she's common. So observant I'm blind."
"Irony: A billboard advertising minimalism. The sun sets in the West; he'll never make it. Chewing gum is like wool socks for sheep."
"I've tried to go back and see the world through my eyes three years ago. I can't do it. The best I can muster is questioning who I am now."
"Do train conductors feel their lives are comfortably predictable or painfully monotonous? Can they drive a car or do they stop ever 2-3 min?"
"American Irony: For better mental and physical health, you must sacrifice sleep and work more."
"I think the novelty of dressing up is starting to fade. It always does. Or my fascination with Mayan tribal wear is growing."
"It feels like a blur. A lot of water has passed under the bridge. I still don't know if I want to be on the bridge or in the water."

"Tweeting" is the verb used for writing in these micro-blogs. I feel tweeting is the shallowest form of communication. Yet RPCV is using it to show how deep he is... I guess when you have never gotten out of the kiddie pool the shallow end can seem deep.

hmmm.. maybe I'll Tweet that last sentence.

At Home in Homer

2009-03-11T08:41:00.014+01:00

My Junior Prom date(and current boyfriend to my good friend Rachael) Tommy's parents lived in Alaska for seven years. They said it just sort of happened. They warned me that I should not move up to Alaska unless I was prepared to stay up here for at least a few years. They warned me that most people living in Alaska just came for short visit and found themselves never wanting to leave.
I couldn't understand this form of thinking pre-Homer. Now...now I get it. If I could stay in Homer permanently I would. I would absolutely live here for at least a few years to forever. Unfortunately the cost of living here is ridiculously inflated. Even more so than the average ridiculous inflation in Alaska in general. I find myself becoming increasingly bummed that I will be leaving Homer at the end of May. I'm just starting to get into the swing of things. I keep meeting cool and interesting people. I have only met one person who is originally from here, so my standard opening question is, "Where ya from originally?" Most of my clothes have Michigan State, Pistons, or Tigers scrawled across the chest in large letters ruining my answer to the question.
Since moving up here I have only left Homer once and it was to go to the town of Soldotna for some shopping. While there I ran into a girl from my high school whom I hadn't seen since my graduation in 2002. Neither of us knowing that the other had moved to Alaska.
Alaska genuinely has some cool people. I think Homer my have more than the average. This is an artist colony so many people are very involved in the arts. Despite only have around 5,000 people I am never lacking interesting cultural events. There are many art galleries in town. On the first Friday of each month they have something called First Friday(Clever I know) where all the galleries put out their new displays and have catered food and the artists come and give talks about their work. This past Friday I attended one about the 20th anniversary of the Exxon Oil Spill. It was fascinating as people's emotions ran high. I was coolly detached always thinking it was a tragedy but never having any personal connection to it.
Every Friday night there is a free foreign film at the college in town. It can be a bit hit or miss but overall I have been happy with the films, also there is free popcorn...if you know me you know Popcorn is my favorite food. There is a regular movie theater too that gets the movies a couple months after they originally came out.
There is a theatre in town and many grand productions that go on at the high school.They bring in artists from all around to perform.I saw an amazing one woman show called Wong flew over the Cucoos nest. On my birthday I attended one of the big events of the year-Jazzline. A monster-sized Dance recital. It was great! I'm hoping to start taking dance lesson from one of the stars of the show soon.
On top of this cool arts community there is very cool brewing community here. There is brewery, Meadery, and winery-wine in Alaska...yeppers and pretty good too. They all host events that are quite fun to introduce a new flavor. One Saturday there was a Home-brew competition. A five dollar donation got you a cup and all the beer you could drink. If you brought your own cup you could drink for free-something to know. These weren't just regular home-brews these were the best of the best. There was a Chocolate Hazelnut one brought down by a guy from Nome who has won tons of National competitions. It was amazing. There was also a large selection of Meads. At the end of the night my original group(a group of people I met just by sitting at their table, I only sat there because a guy had a Flint shirt on) had all left so I went out and stood where they were holding all the beers. I asked the man who was officially in charge to make me a little crate of all the beers that had already been judged by the judges meaning they were free to be drank by everyone. He did and when he left I suddenly became the de facto leader of the beers. Telling people what ones they could drink and giving my suggestions, pumping the keg, and filling their cups to the brim. I love being next to the keg, you meet everyone that way. This was something Tom and I figured out early in college that being in charge of the keg was where you wanted to be early on to meet everyone. The people were fun and energetic at the end of the night when the awards were given out.
There are quite a few bars in town. One even has a craft night. Most of them feature cool local bands most nights of the week. The music scene in this little town is awesome and only suppose to get better in the summer.
There is a cool Coffee Shop called All Hopped Up. I love drinking coffee from there and than saying I'm all hopped up. I am well aware of how dorky that is.
When I first arrived there wasn't much sun, however Michigan doesn't have much sun in January either. The good thing is the days get longer at an amazing rate. Now I would argue it is considerably sunnier than I remember in Michigan at this time of year. For my birthday I had the best weather I have ever seen.
The people up here are fearless. I have met several people who have lived in Antarctica for extended periods of time.There is a pretty big surfing community here but they only surf through the stormy winter weather. Taking the summer off to pursue other activities. The Time Bandit guys(featured on Deadliest Catch) live here.
Tonight I got invited to join a game night that some of the people in the community go to and my church is starting a game night soon... Playing board games is always something I miss after an extended stay at home(my mom and I really got into Boggle at the end of my visit) You better believe I will be bringing Settlers of Catan with me to game night(one of my only regrets in life is that I don't have a picture of my friends and I playing Settlers of Catan my last year at university-a pretty regular occurrence)
There are museums up here. The Pratt Museum being the most famous and respected of the museums. If you aren't into the natural history that the Pratt Museum offers there is also a hair comb museum.
There are many scientists and researchers up here. This past weekend had a science conference. In the summer there is a well known writers conference-Amy Tan attended one year. A Few weeks ago there was a big Quilters conference. I know one of the women that attended and she said it looked like little sweatshop with each woman pouring over her sewing machine.
My church is pretty awesome. Absolutely no people my age. Not even in the surrounding age brackets of my age. But it is still cool. I enjoy the vibe. Just wish they had better music...I'm amazed when we sing a song post-1919.
The sports and activities are great here to. There is a very large trail system throughout town and surrounding town. Many people spend the sunny afternoons in the weekend cross country skiing the trails. I don't know how to ski very well. I do know how to walk, wish is fortunate because at the Alaskan Coastal Studies they rent out free snow shoes. I have taken advantage of this and enjoyed walking around the trails with the snow shoes... Just have to keep your eyes open for Moose. There are also tons of sports you can join in through the community. I play volleyball on Tuesday and Thursday nights. I love it. Although tonight I stayed a half hour longer than I usual do and found I get a little loopy after 9:30 and just start doing my best impression of a Frisian boy dancing. Most of the rest of the week when I want a bit of exercise I got to the pool. Yep, in a community of 5,000 there is a 25 yard pool with three times through out the day to do Lap Swimming. It is a bit pricey(like everything here) which I don't mind because than I really try to get a full work out in.
Near the airport there is a lake where water planes can land in the summer. In the winter while it is frozen there have race car competitions. They are pretty big until the fiching derbies start. Homer is after all the Halibut Capital of the world.
Homer is one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen. The architecture is crap, but the natural beauty is amazing. Located on the Katchamak Bay and surrounded by snow capped mountains it's no wonder so many cruises dock here in the summers.
I have also been lucky enough to be here in the winter and witness the huge Eagle population.
If I haven't convinced you this is an amazing community and that I truly regret that I won't be able to afford to stay here after my contract is up than please let me know what you need from a town that this place is missing. Because I don't see it. Sometimes the end of the road isn't too bad.

Cougar Barbie

2009-03-05T06:21:00.000+01:00

Mandy showed me this and it was too funny not to post on here:

It's not all about Taste

2009-03-05T06:00:00.003+01:00

Even beyond sunny smell or the delectable taste, the greatest thing about an avocado is the texture. It's not too hard, ti's not too soft it almost melts in your mouth. Mash it up and mix it with some other veggies to make Guacamole and it becomes the perfect texture for a dip.
I thought fasting would free up my time to get stuff done. Not to think about food and what not... I realize now that I eat without thinking. So, all that time I had to not think and eat I now fill with looking for fantastic recipes that I fantasize about making.

I have made some good use of this time. I have found the wikipedia page for avocados:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avocado

I also found the official Avocado website:
http://www.avocado.org/

There are some amazing looking recipes on it. There is even a kids section if you want the kiddies to learn about avocados-which if you have a child you should. I didn't learn about them till going to Honduras my last year at university.
Now I gotta find some avocado seeds and in a month or so I could grow my own.

love

2009-03-04T09:39:00.003+01:00

It's not just because I am heading into my 8th day of fasting. Not because my tummy is rumbling. Not because I have been looking up recipes that I wanna try and cook. No none of these reasons are why I'm about to type this next sentence:
I LOVE SANDWICHES!
I do, I really love sandwiches. I love the whole idea of two slices of bread with a slice of meat a slice of cheese. Not enough foods involve the word slice and sandwich is just choke full of them.

ooooo what about Grilled Cheese sandwich? I haven't had one of those in well over a year...maybe two. When I get off this fast I need to make one of those with some tomato soup.

oh, I need to go before I get on to that wonderful topic of soup. Cold Shower, I need a cold shower.

Carol's new hat

2009-03-02T11:15:00.007+01:00

This is sort of my rip off of the "Kinky Reggae" Hat. The instructions were only half complete so I had to improvise a lot and the part that did have instructions I didn't realize til I was almost done that I was not doing what it said at all. It turned out alright though. I like it. Crocheting most of the hat didn't take too long, crocheting around the elastic at the end took twice as long.
Well now that I got my Reggae hat on I gotta put on my Toots and the Maytals album and chill out.

Rugged

2009-02-23T20:19:00.008+01:00

Growing up in Michigan I would often spend my winters imagining myself in some far off land. As I grew older the imaginings became more sophisticated. I imagined myself in a Paris bistro, African safari even strolling along the great wall of China. However, when I was very little my world of imagination wasn't that grand and I got through winter imagining myself in as far off of a land as I could imagine: Alaska. I had seen a documentary about it on PBS. Growing up PBS was my window to what was "out there."
I know it seems a bit odd to imagine yourself in an even colder and harsher environment than you are already in. I did it because it made me feel tough. Rugged in fact. A real bad ass. There was a ditch at the end of our yard that would freeze and become my entery into my Alaskan Adventures. I would trudge through the snow and by the time I had gotten to that icy ditch I was in Alaska. I had places to explore. Animals to see. Dangers to survive. By the time I reached the end of my icy path I had survived a plane crash, fought of grizzlies, and now found myself desperately trying to find a civilization of some sort to let them know I was alive. The journey normally came to an abrupt end as the short winter sun settled in for the night and I was forced to make a B-Line for home, before any real dangers set in.
Although I eventually stopped pretending I was in Alaska every time I went out in the snow I still couldn't help but imagine myself moving to Alaska and proving that I could be a rugged as the best of them. So, here I am in Alaska. Homer, Alaska-a place that is considerably less rugged than the environment I grew up in in Northern Michigan. Between my wireless Internet, the little coffee shops, brewery, art galleries, winery, all-green library, meadery, Chinese buffet, respect for performing arts, bicycle shops, yarn store and a respected museum it can be difficult to remember that I'm in Alaska. It was very dark when I first arrived but there is more sun everyday and I never had a nicer day(weather wise) on my birthday than I did up here.
I sometimes need a reminder I'm in Alaska, the mountains are great at reminding me. Fisherman in a shabby saloon help, so do the eagles. However, the other day I needed and activity to remind me and to connect with something I often imagined myself doing on those wintry days of my childhood- snowshoe walking.
In town they will rent you snowshoes for free. I rented a pair for myself and the five year old I take care of(I only rented some for her because she was with me and assumed she was getting some too). I decided we should use them to go for a walk along the trail system around Homer. We were warned over and over again to be careful of moose- YES! Dangerous Moose! Look at me being rugged in Alaska- and to have fun.
We didn't seen any moose but we saw some Austrian Skiers-almost as dangerous. We may have been on a trail system and never very far from other people or our car, but I didn't know that. I thought we were no where near our car, until our walk back and I could see it was rarely out of view. Also, I was on the look out for moose-rugged.
While snowshoe walking with a five year old maybe not even make the rugged meter it made me feel like I was that kid again, only this time I actually was in Alaska.

Somethings that help remind me I'm in Alaska:

Something that made me forget surfers on my birthday-February 20th:

I sure know how to waste time

2009-02-23T07:34:00.000+01:00

There are so many things I should be doing. Cleaning my cottage, working out, writing my grad school app. Instead I ahve spent a considerable amount of time really trying to memorize all the lyrics to a Dutch song Rosanne. This is why I need a roommate, I'm too weird on my own. I know I know... if you ahve lived with me you probably know I'm not normal either way. I gave that away pretty quick after moving into 318 when Tom caught me arguing with the TV commercials. They are just fool of crap someone needs to tell them off.
Well, if you can't think of an original way to waste time you can do what I did tonight and commit this song to memory:

Rosanne ik weet dat er heel veel mannen zijn
Elke keer weer een ander en mij doet 't pijn
Want jou liefde waarmee jij mij soms verblijdt
Wil ik liever liever liever liever voor altijd

Als ik dacht dat ik je had dan had jij je weer bedacht
Onvoorspelbaar en zo onverwacht
Ik keek maar toe hoe jij mij in verwarring bracht
Ik wil zekerheid dat ik bij jou ben vannacht

Oh oh oh

Rosanne ik weet dat er heel veel mannen zijn
Elke keer weer een ander en mij doet 't pijn
Want jou liefde waarmee jij mij soms verblijdt
Wil ik liever liever liever liever voor altijd

Jij kan je rust niet vinden jou geest is veel te vrij
Jij bent morgen weer anders dan vandaag
Jij wilt je nog niet binden maar dat hoeft ook niet van mij
Ik wil gewoon die zoen het is al dat ik vraag

Oh oh oh

Rosanne ik weet dat er heel veel mannen zijn
Elke keer weer een ander en mij doet 't pijn
Want jou liefde waarmee jij mij soms verblijdt
Wil ik liever liever liever liever voor altijd

Weet wel dat ik hier op je wachten zal
Tot je eindelijk je rust vindt bij mij

Oh oh oh

Rosanne ik weet dat er heel veel mannen zijn
Elke keer weer een ander en mij doet 't pijn
Want jou liefde waarmee jij mij soms verblijdt
Wil ik liever liever liever liever voor altijd

-After the song would end normally Toto's Rosanna would play.... I'm well on my way to ahving that memorized too.

Sweat Stain

2009-02-15T06:22:00.003+01:00

This morning I gave a talk about Kyrgyzstan and Peace Corps and what not. I know, my use of the English language shows how I'm meant to speak in front of people. I didn't realize till half way through how bad I was sweating. My armpits were soaked but I didn't even notice those till later. I had a random sweat patch on my side. I'm always classy. I ended up giving the second half of my speech with my arm pinned next to my side to try and hide the huge sweat stain as best I could.
I always find giving little speeches or talks about yourself so revealing. I enjoyed that after the talk I was able to go to the library to get some reading done and be totally anonymous. However, my anonymity got blown. One of the ladies from my talk happened to be at the library with her grand daughters. She brought them over to meet me and started telling them all about how I had been in Peace Corps in Kyrgyzstan and where that is. The girls asked me some questions, I answered, it was all very polite. Afterwards is when it got weird. There had been a real Alaskan type gentleman- long white hair, scraggly white beard, leathery face, big boots and standard issue flannel- sitting across from me for a few hours before this interaction. He hadn't taken any notice of me, because there was nothing to notice I was just some girl reading a book. After, however, I apparently became the most interesting thing in the place. He just stared at me. I made the obligatory stare back, the kind of stare where it says say something or stop looking at me. He did neither. I eventually just got so creeped out that I left. I normally don't let on lookers win the battle of the creepy stare, but I had a a book to finish and some anonymity to reclaim.

Learning Cockney

2009-02-12T09:50:00.005+01:00

During my university years I spent a summer working in Uganda. Many of the people working there were British. Including my roommate Kelly. Kelly a lovely girl whom I love has one of the hardest accents for me to understand. She comes from a small village outside of Manchester. Another British Girl Laura would sympathize with my plight at trying to understand my roommate and than would try to teach me another strange British Accent: Cockney, which is chalk full of unusual phrases. There is this whole rhyming scheme which I have read a lot about in the 5 years since I was in Africa. I have used some of it correctly to the great shock of several Brits. Sometimes followed with a, "Are you taking the Piss?" Thankfully, Laura corrected me on that phrase early and made sure I knew that it is "Taking THE Piss" not "Taking A piss".
I was youtubing to see what cockney videos I could find and I found this one. I found it to be delightful. I hope you enjoy learning some Cockney...

And to think Brits think our accents make us sound stupid. At least I can say "THree" unlike David Beckham who says, "Free" as in "Yeah, we had Free goals last night."
"I drank Free cups of coffees this morning."
Oh, Cockney accents how you torment me!
"She has Free kids"

Trying to make Knitting and Leg Warmers cool again.

2009-02-09T22:25:00.005+01:00

My old high school buddy Mandy recently said she wanted some knitted leg warmers with skull and cross bones on them. Well, here they are:

The Small Town Parade

2009-02-09T07:45:00.025+01:00

Homer's Winter Carnival was this past weekend. Like any other small town the carnival was used as an excuse to have a parade. I have to admit I have a weakness for small town parades. I love that it is used predomiantly as free advertising for local businesses. I guess it isn't totally free, you have to include the cost of whatever candy was extremely discounted at the local grocery store. I would say judging by the candy thrown out this past weekend Dum-Dums and mints were on sale. Yep, mints-the kind you get at Piozza Hut after a meal. The people up here took being cheap on the candy to new levels. I loved it. I did grab a sweet tart packet that was sitting in the snow and none of the children a round me seemed to notice it.
I love the lack of floats, big showy marching bands, and crowds. Give me a small town parade over New York's Thanksgiving Day Parade any day. I've included photos to take you through the parade. Pretty much if you scan through these photos you will ahve seen the entire parade. The last photo is my favorite.

My 240 Minute challege

2009-02-08T09:04:00.005+01:00

I recently decided to challenge myself to doing 8 Minute abs every day for 30 days. I used my major math skills to figure out 8 times 30 is 240. Also 240 minutes is 4 hours. So, basically I'm taking 4 hours out of the next month to do some sit-ups. Why should I bother mentioning it here? Because I have made a lot of challenges to myself and unless I tell someone I don't stick with it at all. So, I'm posting it here just to put it out there in the universe. Also, if anyone wants to take up this challenge we could be like some cyberspace sit-up buddies... The coolest of all forms of buddies. I have so far done the 8 minute abs for 4 days now or 2/15s of my total challenge. 32 minutes of my 240 minute challenge.
However, tonight's sit-ups should probably only count for 2 or 3 of the 8 minutes. I do not recommend trying to do 8 minute abs after attending a home brew contest that was a drink as much as you can handle for 2 dollars. I'm not sure but I might have dozed off for a bit through the 8minute abs. I'm not sure but it felt like it went faster than normal and my moves were by no means fluid. Although I can't feel the burn, so that's a plus. :)
I'm including the 8 minute abs that I follow down below. I'm including in case you too decide to except the challenge, but I'm mostly including it because of the sweet, sweet music. I wish I heard this music in my daily life. Like while grocery shopping or eating cereal I wish this music was playing in the background.
I want Stevie Wonder's Superstition for whenever I walk into a room for confidence. But nothing says, "hey man I'm mellow," as much as the music in 8 minute abs does.

My New Arch Nemesis

2009-02-06T08:19:00.007+01:00

I seem to be at my best when I have an Arch Nemesis. Not necessarily my funniest period, my funniest periods seem to come when my life is completely falling apart. With the exception of a a couple months before I left Peace Corps my life was in complete shambles and I was not funny which led to a bunch of my friends abandoning me because, "I just wasn't fun anymore." Good to know that when your life completely falls apart, you should just deal with it your self and not expect your friends to help you out in anyway... I mean after all what are friends for? Certainly not being there in a time of crisis. Life Lesson learned... bottle up all emotions and appear happy and funny at all times. Moving on.
No, I can get an arch-nemesis anytime. They actually seem to come along when things are going great. I guess it gives me something to focus any negative energy that is inside of me on something. I haven't had an arch-nemesis in a long time. Mostly because I'm happy and comfortable with who I am. In high school, however, I had many an arch nemesises-nemisi(?) plural for nemesis-anybody?
I would bond with people over a hatred of a third party. I have made many a friend by disliking the same person. Most of the time our hatred for the third party eventually evaporates and we are left with a good friendship. I have on occasion had an arch-nemesis turn into a good friend That mostly comes from them not backing down. They dish it out as good as I can and they can take what I dish out. I eventually love that person and am forced to find little ways to start chipping away at their resolve to hate me and make them my friend. Home-made cookies are a great hatred ice breaker. Because how can you hate someone that made you cookies from scratch?
I thought going a few years without an arch-nemesis meant I had grown up. I thought I was moving on. Doing the whole mature thing. I couldn't be more wrong. I have made an arch-nemesis with the Karaoke man here in town. This involves some back story that I don't feel like re-writing so if you haven't been keeping up feel free to scroll down now to the blog entry from: February 1st 2009 I Know Karaoke .
I took up his challenge and went down to the bar he works at tonight. I waited til a late-ish time in the evening to head down there. I wasn't sure what to expect-pandemonium was one of the many possibilities that went through my head. I packed away some stationary and envelopes to work on letters in case I felt awkward being at a karaoke night alone. I walked in, purchased my one beer I allow myself, and instantly pulled out the stationary. Not out of feeling uncomfortable at the bar, the other 4 people there all seemed to be alone too. I needed something to entertain myself with. There was no music. I wrote letters and stared at my AN. He remembered me but we didn't speak. We didn't need to we both knew this wasn't crazy.
I waited and wrote and sipped and waited and nothing the crowd thinned down and than a few more walked in and would think about it and leave. He wasn't even bothering to have anyone sing.... That's how lame it was. Karaoke Night without the Karaoking. Well, he was right I do find that a bit crazy. Just a different kind of crazy than I was thinking of.
There is a karaoke night on Mondays too. I don't work Tuesdays. I thought Thursday would be a the better of the two nights for some crazy karaoking. Maybe I'm right, maybe Monday is worse. I'm going to have to go and find out for myself. Since I don't have work I plan on observing this craziness or at least intimidatingly staring at AN til the bar closes.
Round one goes to me.

All photos come from google imaging Arch-Nemesis.

Random Fact I learned from IMDB today:

2009-02-05T07:31:00.004+01:00

Kurtwood Smith who played "Red Foreman" on That 70s Show got the part after the original choice Chuck Norris was unable to do it because of commitments to "Walker, Texas Ranger." I can only imagine how different the show would have been if it hadn't been for that damn scheduling conflict.

Chic Shaper

2009-02-05T07:09:00.004+01:00

I enjoy the Chic Shaper ads. They try and dress themselves up as if they are for correcting your posture. Yet, all the women are wearing incredibly low cut tops and the photos aren't showing straightened backs but perkier breasts. I wonder why it felt the need to hide what it really is. I say "it" like the Chic Shaper was making it's own ad.
If you don't know what I'm talking about it's worth checking out their website. ONly if you want to improve your posture.
http://www.getchicshaper.com

Prop 8 - The Musical

2009-02-03T11:18:00.001+01:00

Everyone has probably seen this already(I know I'm way behind) but this is absolutely Fantastic!
Preach Love, Not Hate.

"Prop 8 - The Musical" starring Jack Black, John C. Reilly, and many more... from Jack Black

Wristband?

2009-02-03T10:25:00.005+01:00

Since I was snowed in all day today and didn't have to work I took the opportunity to try knitting some new things. I found a pattern on the internet for a wrist band and followed it exactly. The only problem was the girl who designed it gave herself too much credit for how tiny her wrist are. She said her's are super tiny and it took so many sitches for her's so a large wrist must take so many stitches. Well here are the results of how big she feels a big person's wrist is:

Come on! I don't think even the Grady Jackson has that big of a wrist. So, that needs some tweeking.
Oh, and if you are wondering what's wrong with my eyes in the pic my all-day, snowed-in knitting marathon was accompnied by an America's NExt Top Model Marathon. Tara spends so much time taking about the half squint... clearly I don't get what she is talking about.

My First Completes Non-Scarf Knitting project

2009-02-03T06:35:00.002+01:00

I had never kintted anything that wasn't a scarf so I thought I would experiment with making something different.So, I tried to make an iphone cozy.... I didn't make it long enough so we are just going to call it a cell phone cozy :)

I know Karaoke

2009-02-01T03:00:00.001+01:00

I got challenged to come to Karaoke next week. There is Karaoke on Mondays and Thursdays at a local bar named Duggans. The host of the bar was sitting next to me at a one woman show I saw tonight. She mentioned that the Karaoke guy was in the crowd. I responded by yelling,louder than necessary, "There is Karaoke in this TOWN?!"
"Yes, there most certainly is on Mondays and Thursdays."
"ungh..."
"Yeah, its the craziest Karaoke, ever."
"Ever? That is a pretty bold statement. I have been to a lot of Karaoke. Much of it Crazy. I mean you have to be crazy to stand up in front of a room of strangers and sing, knowing darn well you can't sing."
He did that laugh, oh god THAT laugh, the one where they are blowing off what you just said.It is just short of being a chuckle, it makes no noise- except for maybe a puff of air.. I hate that laugh. Then he said, "Well, I'm sure you have never seen karaoke as crazy as this. You need to come down for our Karaoke nights. You won't be able to handle how crazy it is."
I did that half chuckle-"blow off what they are saying" laugh.
He doesn't know who he is talking to. I don't know a lot of things but I know how to karaoke. I also know how crazy karaoke can be.
I have done Karaoke from Honduras to Scotland, from Uganda to Kyrgyzstan. Since the Dutch don't seem to have karaoke anywhere in the country I was given a microphone and allowed to sing behind the bar-"Gold Digger". I have done karaoke so many times that I have a signature song- "Build Me Up Buttercup". On my birthday I make random strangers let me sing with them as their forced upon present to me. I also have learned the importance of picking your songs to cater to your audience, which led to me knowing three country songs by heart. I have several rap songs, a plethora of Classic Rock songs, and can do pretty much any girl power song out there for a predominately female of fabulous gay crowd. I have made a room full of men cheating feel uncomfortable by singing "Before He Cheats". I can do "I got you Babe", a duet- by myself. I have had a friend surprise me by signing me up for "I Believe I Can Fly" and brought down the house. I have shouted at the top of my lungs, "SWEET CAROLINE BUHM BUHM BUHM good times never seemed so good, SO GOOD! SO GOOD! SO FUCKING GOOD!" and "ALICE, ALICE, ALICE WHO THE FUCK IS ALICE?!" In a bowling alley in Uganda I have linked arms with complete strangers and sang the chorus of "Zombie". A group of Brits was rudely interrupted by me trying to join in, in upstate New York. In a bowling alley in Salt Lake City I sang a perfectly choreographed version of "Freshman"
while a girl was passed out on the floor. I have done a flying leap off a mini-stage in Honduras at the climax of the song. The Disco lights, the highest honor in the karaoke world, have come on more times than I can count. I have carried on singing "It's Raining Men" while my friend Sara yelled at a very, very straight man that it is cool if he was "bi-curious".I spent almost every weekend my last year of university going to the karaoke bar two blocks from my house.
Most importantly I sang karaoke at a kiosk on the streets-of Kyrgyzstan- after drinking at an Ambassador's house-dancing with prostitutes-having friends trying to prostitute me out for good beer-on Christmas-THROUGH AN EARTHQUAKE THAT WAS SO STRONG IT DESTROYED MY FRIENDS HOUSE! SO! DON'T TELL ME, I DON'T KNOW CRAZY KARAOKE!
I'll rise to the occasion I'll go to this karaoke of his. I might even sing my signature song. However, I will not find it the "craziest,ever" unless the volcano that is about to erupt actually does erupt, causing a tsunami, while I'm singing, and a local eagle breaks through a window, and takes my beer right out of my hand. If all that happens than he is right, Karaoke at Duggans is the craziest...ever.

Thanks Mandy!

2009-01-31T08:22:00.000+01:00

I generally don't like Peyton Manning, but this is too funny! Thank you Mandy for suggesting it. I have to recomend it to all of you to watch now. You won't regret it, even if you ahve to wait for it to buffer like I did.

name your children well.

2009-01-30T23:02:00.004+01:00

Everyone likes to talk about how crazy celebrity baby names are. They do give their children some odd names. I would like to point out that they aren't the worst at naming their children. The worst are Hippie/Potheads.
Homer is a hippie friendly area. There is even a yurt dealer in town because they are so popular up here. Today I met a little girl with Dreadlocks. She is five years old, and she matched her mother's dreadlocks, home-made clothes look.
Her name:
Raindrop Tigress.
yeah........
Don't act like that doesn't make Coco and Apple look a lot better. I can only imagine why her parents would name her that...
..."raindrop because water gives life and she is a drop in this life. And Tigress because it it powerful and strong."
I have never smoked pot but I guess if I did I would want to name my child Vapor Lioness.

Mountain Dew

2009-01-30T06:45:00.003+01:00

Today I saw the best Mountain Dew commercial. I didn't see it on TV, I saw it live. They weren't filming a New Mountain Dew commercial up here, but they should have.
To get to my house from town it is necessary to drive slowly on a long and winding road. For my lowland up-bring one part is particularly terrifying. It is a turn that is next to a drop-off, with no guard-rail, and makes a 180 degree turn in a short amount of time.
I follow the instructions the signs give me and go around the turn at a mellow 20 mph. Today as I came up the Mountain and as I approached the turn I saw it. The perfect Mountain Dew Commercial. It forced me to slow down and move over to the right to give it room.
What I saw was a Ford F250 come sliding around the turn. Tokyo Drift style. Going extremely fast. It looked like he was about to slide of the edge. The back end of the truck hanging over the edge. Just as the truck as about to go over the cliff the driver regained control and than shot down the mountain at an accelerated pace. Just as he passed by me he cracked open a Mountain Dew and took a long swig and smiled.
Perfection. I couldn't have come up with a better Mountain Dew Commercial if I had tried.

Mid-western Politeness in Alaska

2009-01-27T08:32:00.003+01:00

I'm very polite.
Well sure, no, I mean obviously not if you know me.
I meant I'm very polite in a store, out in general public kind of way.
Ya know, that Midwestern kind of politeness.
I can wait in line patiently.
I can do the chit-chat with cashiers if necessary.
I love doing that whole, "have a nice day thing." However, this Midwestern politeness makes me look like a total A##hole sometimes. It mostly comes at the end of a transaction, if the cashier isn't as polite as I am.
The cashier will just hand me my receipt and say, "Here's your receipt." That seems to be the norm up here in Alaska. The problem is I have it programed in my head not to just end there. I try to just take the receipt and walk away, but my brain clicks and turns. The final result ends up being me ticking and nodding as I take my receipt, or more often than not it goes something like this:
"Here's your receipt."
"Thanks, you too."
????????-all across the face of the cashier.
My trigger response isn't so weird if the cashier says, "Have a nice day."
That ingrained polite trigger response just makes me look like a goon.
Note to self:
work on a proper response to, "Here's your receipt."
Maybe, "Thanks. I will file this, under "D" for donut."

A Video about the Eagles in Homer, Alaska

2009-01-26T23:40:00.001+01:00

I made the video. Totally Geeking it up but I wanna show ya all of Alaska here.

Support your Local Brewers

2009-01-25T12:04:00.006+01:00

I just want to take a minute and recommend Homer Brewery's Broken Birch Bitter. It is a great beer. I like to say, "Travel Globally, Drink Locally." It also works with with food, "Travel Globally, Eat Locally."
I support supporting local companies. I think it helps the economy and helps an area retain it's character. I have tried most of Homer Brewery's brews. I personally like Broken Birch Bitter the most. I has a great hop/citrus taste.
If their is a brewery in your area and you haven't checked them out yet, go ahead and try the whole selection. Worked for Tom and I at Squatters in Salt Lake City. It only takes one afternoon to try them all.

A Stinky and Expensive Habit

2009-01-25T06:34:00.006+01:00

It's not my stinky habit. I have a lot of friends who "just need to" do it pretty much every day or at least every other. It leaves you stinky, it ages your skin, and empties your pockets of any extra money you have.
No, I'm not talking about smoking. I'm talking about tanning. As in going to a Tanning Salon. My friends and acquaintances who are addicted to tanning say things about their addiction without a flinch of irony: "I'm super busy. I gotta go shopping, get lunch, and I HAVE to go tanning.", "No, seriously I have to go tanning. NO, seriously I am a light brown and I really NEED to be a dark healthy looking brown.", or "Yeah I think I might have skin cancer... but what can ya do. I gotta stop off at tanning salon later."
This idea that you NEED to go tanning I find ridiculous. Especially when in an excessive amount it seems to age skin at the kind of warp speed that you only see with chain smokers. It's kinda gross.
I went tanning today. I'm like one of those people who only smokes when they are drunk. They know it is bad and unnecessary but they do it anyway. I tan when I am extremely pale. I have only ever gone tanning at two other periods in my life. Once because I won two free coupons and John Fyolek and I went tanning together at the end of high school. Then again to get ready to go to Honduras, because I had gotten talked into being afraid of going to a sunny location with no prep.
I decided that it would be okay for me to go again since I rarely see the sun. I am starting to turn transparent. I also found out if I get really pale I start to look pretty sick, and not "sick" being used as slang for hot, no just sick.
The thing is, now I'm remembering that I didn't just stop because it's unhealthy, I stopped because you stink afterwards. There is that specific post tanning smell. My friends who are addicted to tanning don't seem to notice their distinct smell anymore, but it's there, lingering. While I never say anything about their post-tanning smell I'm quite taken aback by it lingering on my skin.
I have to go put some perfume on before I got to the bar and have my skin absorb in the second hand smoke. For once I won't mind it, the stink of a cigarette is a step up from the stink of a tanning salon.

Go Daddy

2009-01-24T05:25:00.003+01:00

I decided to look at Godaddy.com to see whether I should go ahead and buy the name carolbontekoe.com to make it easier on you-the dozens of you that read this blog. I figured you could than just type in my first and last name throw a dot com at the end and find me Carol Bontekoe.
Shockingly carolbontekoe.com was still available. Since I am the only one in the world, or at least the only one that comes up when you google my name(using google as a verb not a noun is super cool, also you should facebook me sometime). I didn't appreciate Go Daddy trying to talk me into a bunch of other names. Names it felt were better than carolbontekoe.com.
carolbontekoe.asia-for some reason costs as much as .com
Go Daddy even went so far as to suggest maybe I might want carolynbontekoe.com or carolinebontekoe.com
How insulting! That's not my name don't call me that! It's bad enough that I saw in a baby naming book once that said, "Why name your baby Carol when there are nicer more elegant versions like Carolyn and Caroline?"
First it was books suggesting that my name wasn't good enough now it is the Internet. Who does that? Who goes, "yeah, your name is alright but you see how adding three letters to the end makes it that much better?"
At least my last name is okay for getting a domain name.It keeps the price Low. I feel sorry for a Carol Morris, Carol Myers, Carol Gibson, Carol Hill, Carol Kennedy, or Carol Hunter. Because of their painfully common last names their names will cost them between 700 to 4,000 dollars for a domain name. Carol Bontekoe is worth 10 dollars. Wait! That just made me sound like a low end hooker...
In the end I decided not to pay for a domain name. Not because Go Daddy had insulted me by suggesting I might be better off with Carolyn or Caroline as my first name. No, I decided not to because except for a handful of people no one knows how to spell my name. I'd be like, "oh, Dude you can check out what I'm doing by going to my website it's just carolbontekoe.com"
They would talk to me a few days later telling me that they couldn't find anything when they typed in my name. I would then find out that they tried:
caroleboniko.com
carrollbotko.com
carolbontico.com
carolebonetko.com

I'm hard to find if you don't know how to spell my name. I do know at least one person who knows how to spell my name, Caitlin Joy Dobson. I have been looking for adjectives to describe myself and I liked how she used my name(correctly spelled) to describe me.
C - aring
A - dventurous
R - owdy
O - ver-the-top
L - ovely

L - oud
Y - oung-at-heart
N - ice
N - ever late

B - rave
O - pen-minded
N - octurnal
T - rue friend and true to herself
E - nergetic
K - ick ass (no really, she could kick your ass!)
O - utgoing
E - veryday people

It may not be a domain name, but it's all spelled correctly and not trying to make me jazz up my name. That means alot to me.
:)

My shiny shoes

2009-01-21T08:17:00.002+01:00

"Hey do you have a small pair of shoes I could..."
"Oh, I.."
"OH.MY GOD!!!"
The twelve year old who was going to ask to borrow a pair of my shoes had suddenly gotten a glimpse of my bright green shoes. Yeah, "Oh my God" probably is the correct response. I smiled and we both agreed my shoes probably weren't going to fit her.
Ya know the "Oh my God" response would be a lot nicer and more fun if it were to lets say, my breasts. But alas it is only for my feet.
oh, and my hands.
well and if you are next to me in a plane-my shoulders.
okay, I guess I'm just an "Oh My God" kind of Girl.

Wanna see if I can actually get a free macbook

2009-01-21T03:50:00.000+01:00

Hey All
Check out this site freemacbookair.com.
They're giving away the MacBook Air!
Click here: http://www.freemacbookair.com/?referral=1koe8pc
Thanks!

Grievances

2009-01-20T12:49:00.002+01:00

How Life is...

2009-01-20T08:08:00.003+01:00

I saw 5 moose today! Oh, and one more tiny lil thing... Today is Bush's last day!!!!!!!
Free at last free at last THANK GOD almighty we are FREE AT LAST!!!

How to beat an addiction...

2009-01-18T03:06:00.003+01:00

I'm not unique in my addiction to Diet Coke. Practically every woman I know is either currently or has been addicted to Diet Coke. I have finally beat that addiction, thanks all to not being able to afford Diet Coke. At almost 3 dollars for a 2 liter of Diet Coke it is well out of my reach. So, thank you Alaska for being to expensive for me to afford Diet Coke.

Kom op Konijntje

2009-01-17T09:48:00.005+01:00

If you have seen me since I got back from the Netherlands or you saw me in the Netherlands you have probably heard me singing the song konijntje. It is a great song.
The chorus part literally translates into, "Come on Bunny, wiggle it, wiggle it." Feel free to enjoy a touch of the ridiculousness of Dutch culture.

* Found the lyrics to this amazing song and have traslated it the best I could:
Ik zie mensen wiebele
I see people wiggling

Kom op konijntje doe maar wiebele, wiebele
Come on bunny do more wiggling,wiggle
Kom op konijntje doe maar wiebele, wiebele, huppel
Come on Bunny do more wiggling,wiggle, skip
Kom op konijntje doe maar wiebele, wiebele, huppel
Come on Bunny do more wiggling,wiggle, skip
Doe maar huppele alsof je in het bos bent
Do more skipping as if you were in the forest

Kom op konijntje doe maar wiebele, wiebele
Kom op konijntje doe maar wiebele, wiebele, huppel
Kom op konijntje doe maar wiebele, wiebele, huppel
Doe maar huppele alsof je in het bos bent

Kom op konijntje doe maar huppele, wiebel
Come on bunny do more skipping, wiggle
Wiebel met je oortjes, laat ze heen en weer wiebele
wiggle with your ears, let them go ahead and wiggle
Kom op konijntje, doe je ding, doe je dansje
Come on bunny, do your thing, do you little dance
Kom op konijntje, ah
Kom op konijntje, ah

Ok konijntje, het is je dag vandaag
ok bunny, today is your day
Ik zing een liedje en ik doe het een beetje traag
I sing a little song and I do it a bit slowly
Voor jou alleen, voor niemand anders
for you alone and for no one else
Konijntje, omhoog met die handen
Bunny upwards with the hands

Huppel huppel konijntje, huppel en wiebel
skip, skip bunny, skip and wiggle
Huppel huppel konijntje, konijntje wiebel
skip skip bunny, bunny wiggle
Doe maar wiebele en huppele en wiebele
do more wiggling and skipping and wiggling
Beweeg die oortjes heen en weer
move the ears back and forth

Perfect Timing

2009-01-16T08:20:00.003+01:00

Today I witnessed the most perfect timing on a fart that has ever existed. The only one I have ever seen come close to the one I saw today was in 6th grade. I was doing sit-ups and just as I came up I let one rip right in Neele Nedvad's face.
Today however was better for the sheer fact that I'm an adult and they shouldn't be as big of a deal.
Tonight was open gym volleyball. Most of the people are middle aged. One of the older men from the group was serving and right as he hit the ball he let out a huge fart.
You would think... I mean really YOU WOULD THINK that grown adults would ignore it and play the ball out. we couldn't. It seemed that after that moment the ball was suspended in the air. There was time enough to hit it. Instead of hitting the ball we all just stared at each other. When the ball hit we all just lost it and start giggling like 5 year olds. We would almost gain composure and than we would lose it
again.
Mature, eh?
The man who did the serve/fart turned bright bright red. I have never seen an adult get that red from embarrassment.
I was suprised by how hard I was laughing. I hate fart jokes. I think fart jokes are a last resort at humor.
We eventually were able to play again. While we were playing I kept running it through my head why I had laughed so hard. I eventually realized that it was because of timing for the fart. So, while I hate fart jokes, I love perfect timing.

When warm weather is bad...

2009-01-16T03:51:00.002+01:00

I like that in Alaska they cancel school because of warm weather. They said on the news today, "All this wamr weather causes school cancelations for tomorrow."
What a weird place this is...
Love it!

My World

2009-01-14T09:45:00.001+01:00

My World
Originally uploaded by carolspacelynn

Made yet another video. Last one was about me and the world. This one is about how I see the world.

Why I Travel

2009-01-13T10:58:00.003+01:00

One of the main reasons I keep this blog is to keep track of my adventures. The other other reason is to hopefully inspire the reader to travel. It worked with Shawn... She came all the way to Friesland... So, I'll keep doing this. However, not that long ago I introduced photos into the mix. Now I'm hopefully introducing video. This is just a short little video of why I travel. Hope it works and I hope you enjoy.

Water in the ear...

2009-01-12T00:18:00.011+01:00

I went to church this morning. I figured on top of the whole spiritual aspect it would be a good way to meet some people. I got a little welcome gift for coming: a jar of home-made raspberry jam. This made me way too happy. It is a little jar, however I thought it was so cute that I snatched it and admired it for a minute. I then came to my senses and put the little jar into my Kermit the Frog bag.
There was a good chance for me to put myself out there but I panicked. It was that period where new people can stand up and introduce themselves. I was clearly the only new person. I looked down, than realized that wasn't enough of a commitment. I engrossed myself in my church bulletin.
There was a long punctuated pause.?!.!???(I don't know which punctuation makes it in punctuated pause-wait is that even a real thing?)
You would think by just being me I would be used to that weight that sits on your back when people are just staring at you. Some how on a day to day basis I can ignore it but in the house of the Lord it seemed extra heavy. I powered through and kept reading the bulletin, as if I no interest in the new people.
At the exact moment I broke and started to raise my hand the minister start talking again.
Thank you God.
The service was pretty typical until the very end. The did a renewal of baptism. The minister went around splashing water all over the place. He warned a head of time that some might get on you but that was a good thing. I sat right next to the center aisle, he flicked some high over a bunch of us as I managed to get it right in my eye. He than walked up right be side me and forcefully flicked a bunch of water right into my ear. It was hardly the scattering he did the rest of the time. It seemed almost like he was through baptism water saying, "Don't make a fool of me again, when I give you the chance to stand up and talk about yourself you better darn well do it!"
I hit my opposite ear to knock the water out of my ear and made sure to do everything perfectly through the last bit of service.
At the end of service the old lady brigade immediately came up to talk to me. They always find me. I chatted with them trying to appear interesting and like someone they should talk with more. I also tried to make it as clear as possible that I know no one here and have nothing to do. I have knitting circle date for Feb 2nd. At least it's something.
After meeting so many old ladies that I will never remember any of their names, except for Caroline-she was so close to having a nice name just three letters too long.
After I got done with church I drove down to check out the water plane landing area. In the winter it is used for more than water landings. They use it for racing cars. Yep. Went and watched a car race on a frozen lake. I try to avoid frozen lakes, I think I saw Little Women a few too many times.
It was a nice warm day today- 20 degrees. I don't understand why so many people just sat in their cars to watch the races. I got out and enjoyed it. The race I watched a 17 year old girl named Heather won it. I really enjoyed that. I'll cheer a girl on in anything where you would assume a guy would win, like ice racing. Heather didn't just win but dominated the field. The best part was that on the side of her car it said, "HEATHER" in big letters. There is no more insulting name to men for a girl to have while she whoops their butts... well maybe Tiffany.
I didn't chat with anyone out there but I went on a frozen lake. Baby steps.
IT'll still be a while before I make some friends, but I not going to let that keep me from getting out and about.

tasty...

2009-01-11T11:06:00.001+01:00

My first Mooseburger!

How do you make friends?

2009-01-11T09:11:00.008+01:00

I just realized after typing in my title you can't ever write/say the three words "how do you..." together without following it up with, "solve a problem like Maria?"
That's a good song. I should watch Sound of Music more often... but I have issues with watching any Nazi movie more than every few years. Yes, Sound of Music is a Nazi movie... not a Nazi propaganda movie but a movie about/dealing with Nazis. In case you didn't know Nazis are scary, they aren't people to go sing with about your age in a greenhouse.... I'm 24 going on 25 and I would tell any girl who is 16 that singing Nazis should be avoided.
Wait
Why did I sign on to blogger?
Oh, yeah...
My grandpa likes to call me his vagabond grand-daughter, which is fine and some what true. The only problem with being a "vagabond" is having to make new friends all the time. The thing is one of the best parts about moving around all the time is getting to make new friends.
See what I did there?
I'll explain.
by changing the word "having" to the word "getting" it becomes an opportunity, not a task for survival.
I haven't decided yet whether I will have a negative outlook on making friends or a positive one... all depends on if I make some friends.
I don't know how to make friends... not in life in general... it's more of a Homer, AK specific thing.
More of a me in Homer, AK specific thing.
I chose to move here without knowing anyone. I also work at a job where I have no co-workers. I'm not taking any classes. I live alone.
So, how do you make friends when there are no natural outlets for making friends?
I signed up and paid for open gym basketball. I am middle aged at the open gym. I'm also the only female. And I seem to be the only person there who doesn't think they are God's gift to basketball. I'll keep going for the exercise, but I don't think it will be a great open door to new friends.
I'm hoping to get out of work early on an occasional Monday.
why?
There is a knitting circle from 3-5 on Mondays... Fingers crossed I can meet with the gals at that and have them teach me to cable(knitting term, don't feel bad if you don't know what it is-it just means you aren't as hip as me) Oh, yes- I have never been to a knitting circle but I can imagine.
I tried something I knew nothing about and have had to quickly throw away my naivety. I posted a little blurp on Craigslist under "strictly platonic" saying I was new to the area and was just wondering what there was to do. I also said if people wanted someone to hang out with or to show me the city I was up for going out.
The responses I got weren't proportional to what I put out there. I won't mention them here.. some of you couldn't handle it. Those of you who can, I have already told. I feel not responding to an email is a bit rude but I know no polite way to respond. And since I'm getting recognized on the street from my photos I attached to it, I think any response to any email would be the talk of the town.
I'm going to keep trying to go out and meet people and make friends. There is a good chance this will end in failure. I promise to document it here. I would like to say that if you have any suggestions for ways to make friends with no connections I am all ears. I'll let you know if you suggestion works. :)
I got nothin' to lose.

some more of Homer

2009-01-09T02:56:00.006+01:00

Snapshots from Homer Alaska

2009-01-08T01:06:00.010+01:00