Learning Cockney

During my university years I spent a summer working in Uganda. Many of the people working there were British. Including my roommate Kelly. Kelly a lovely girl whom I love has one of the hardest accents for me to understand. She comes from a small village outside of Manchester. Another British Girl Laura would sympathize with my plight at trying to understand my roommate and than would try to teach me another strange British Accent: Cockney, which is chalk full of unusual phrases. There is this whole rhyming scheme which I have read a lot about in the 5 years since I was in Africa. I have used some of it correctly to the great shock of several Brits. Sometimes followed with a, "Are you taking the Piss?" Thankfully, Laura corrected me on that phrase early and made sure I knew that it is "Taking THE Piss" not "Taking A piss".
I was youtubing to see what cockney videos I could find and I found this one. I found it to be delightful. I hope you enjoy learning some Cockney...

And to think Brits think our accents make us sound stupid. At least I can say "THree" unlike David Beckham who says, "Free" as in "Yeah, we had Free goals last night."
"I drank Free cups of coffees this morning."
Oh, Cockney accents how you torment me!
"She has Free kids"